4/10/18 Javalina Is Not Ready To Drive?

    I guess it is partially my fault.  I like to tell the boys that I started driving when I was twelve, and Javalina, being competitive really wants to get in there and take the steering wheel.  On our way home today, he started with "ooh, let me drive the last little bit."  I instantly said no, nice try.  He continued "come on, Dad." I was thinking "this just sounds like a bad idea all around, as usual I am in a hurry to get to work, but am I being a Dick?"  He jumped off the Excursion and ran around, not letting me get off, because then it would be over.
    It is 5:00pm, people are coming home, we can't try to drive in the neighborhood, there are too many people probably over at Akins.  I honestly kept saying no, but I don't just like to say no without a good reason.  He was still by the door on my side with his "come on, Dad!"  "Come on, Dad!"  I kept shaking my head saying this was not going to be a good idea, but if we are going to do this, Listen!
    I got off the driver's seat, the Excursion was in the driveway, maybe 5 feet from the garage door, he had probably 20 feet he could back up with no problems.  Nobody else was home, so there were no other cars to worry about.  I told him about his feet, he only uses the right leg for both gas and/or brake.  We went through it a few times.  I told him if there are any problems we don't go faster we STOP!  which pedal is that?  I then explained the PRND and the steering wheel which we were not going to really use too much.  Finally, there was nothing else to do but turn on the vehicle.  I told him leave it in P, step on the gas, you can hear the vroom, the power that the car generates to move when you press the pedal.  You don't need this to move back a couple feet, all you're going to do is slowly release the brake and we will automatically move backwards and then you will stop it.
   As soon as he put it in R, he panicked, he let go of the brake, we moved a little, he then stepped on the gas, I yelled, we started accelerating in reverse, and got halfway out to the street, I then just yanked the transmission into P, figuring a damaged vehicle will be better than a neighbor's destroyed garage.  Both of us got more than what we wanted out of that exchange and I yelled at him what happened?  Of course, he blamed the Excursion, I said no, that is a sign of fail on you.  This car has never done that with me, start with blaming you.  "Maybe my feet slipped and I got confused."  Yes, that is what happened.  This is my fault, there was not enough space here for anything other than mistakes.  Plus the Excursion does not have an emergency brake in the middle like Wife's Kia or even Boy's Edge.  We will try again, but hopefully, this buys me a couple weeks.