2/28/15 Two Months In 2015?

    We are two months into the new year.  I didn't make New Year's Resolutions but I did say I wanted to add some changes to my life.  So far, I have read two books which I have done blogs about.  I m reading a third one but it is Hemingway's collection and appears to have all his works.  It might take awhile to get through.  I'm 30-40 pages in, first story was interesting, see how other stories continue.
    I had mentioned increasing my walking again and I had.  I was back up to 4 miles a night and even got the treadmill up to our bedroom, plan being I wake up and get another mile or two before I start my day.  I have not had a chance to do this, easy to think of, harder to do.  I also twisted my left ankle somehow, and this week passed without me doing anything qualifying as exercise.  Add to the ankle, my right knee, left forearm, left shoulder, neck and it's a wonder I get out of bed at all.  I want to do more and I figure I will, but I guess age is catching up on me.
    Work is also forcing me to stay home, usually we get busy in waves and it had started in January, but February came and went and I don't believe I got any OT all month.  On the one hand, I love the extra money, on the other, I do enjoy not always being at work, so for now, I'll say it's been nice to relax.
    Wife keeps getting her hopes up, she is constantly applying for new jobs and we keep hoping someone steals her to a higher paying job.  Bastrop has been great, but without an opportunity to go up or see a promotion, my opinion is "time to go".  Reading some of her letters of recommendation from the last job she applied for, even I am impressed with the woman who cooks our meals.  This little lady sounds downright amazing on paper, why isn't somebody paying her a million dollars already?
    Boy as I mentioned earlier has kinda moved out.  He broke his computer monitor tripping over himself running out the door as he saw freedom last week.  Of course it's "daddy, buy me a new monitor".  What am I gonna do, say no?  I also bought him a new printer, since he won't have ours at his disposal, and I don't like him begging or needing others to be in a friendly mood, although I am sure his roommates don't mind, they all love each other, right now.  I worry because I have roommates I stopped talking to, after we stopped living together, ehh, the ride was fun while it lasted.
    With Boy out of the house, and me not working like before, and my brother having moved out a few months ago, suddenly, this house feels way too big.  We keep discussing possibility of selling, market is hot and we could make a pretty penny.  A coworker sold his house same day he put it on market and for their asking price.  I don't want to make a decision I'll regret and Chubs is already crying he doesn't want to move, but it is something that might happen, maybe even by the summer.  Boy says if we do, to get something with some acreage.  I would love that, but land here is expensive.

2/27/15 Breaking Bad Was Wow?

    I just finished watching Breaking Bad marathon style on Netflix.  It really was an intense, scary, intimidating show.  We had tried watching it a couple years ago and I found it too gory.  The episode where Walt has the kid on the pole in the basement tied with a bike lock was too surreal.  The patience of each scene.  Having the time for a soliloquy with a gun pointed to a character's head.  Or the opposite when Walt would run into a room with not a second to spare screaming to Jesse or Skyler.
    The premise is Walt is dying of lung cancer, he is a chemistry teacher in a local high school in Albuquerque, New Mexico and he wants to leave his family money after he is gone.In comes an old student of his and introduces him to the underground world of "cooking meth".  We see Walt go from a weak coughing dying desparate man, to almost the devil incarnate.  Once he gets going, he laughs in the face of death multiple times and his mentor Jesse who brought him into the game now fears him
          "look... look, you two guys are just... guys okay?  Mr. White... he's the devil.  You know,
           he is... he is smarter than you, he is luckier than you.  Whatever... whatever you think is
           supposed to happen... I'm telling you, the exact reverse opposite of that is gonna happen,
           okay?"
    There is nothing for poor Jesse to do but ride out the show according to how Walt demands.  And yes, you do feel sorry for Jesse because he was happy living under the radar, while Walt wants to take the same skills and build an empire.
    Walt knows he is a man with a couple years to live, so maybe he takes risks that normal people would not plus he becomes drunk with power.  There are a couple of points in the story line where they could get out, the best one being where they could sell the methylamine they stole from the train for $5 million a piece, he says no.  He has already calculated he could turn that amount into $300 million dollars.  His wife tries to reason with him and his retort leaves her feeling like she is trapped when she is crying to him that one day somebody will come to get him knocking on the door, his response:
          "You clearly don't know who you're talking to, so let me clue you in.  I am not in danger,
           Skyler.  I am the danger.  A guy opens his door and gets shot, and you think that of
           me?  No!  I am the one who knocks."
    The end is a massive shootout Walt style, and it is not surprising of those that walk out surviving, Walt truly sacrifices himself for those he loved.  The end left me feeling drained, crying and almost every emotion felt.  It was written and acted very well.  I was late to join the bandwagon because I don't like drama shows, but this was a very entertaining series.

2/26/15 The Picture of Dorian Gray Book 2?

    The first attempt at reading a book left me filling very meh.  This book is great and reads very fast. It is the story of Dorian Gray, who is an extremely beautiful man.  Man being a bit of a stretch, since the story picks up when Dorian is seventeen.  He becomes friends first with Basil Hallward and through him friends with Lord Henry.  These two are considerably older than Dorian, but Basil does not hide his obsession and fascination with the young Dorian, he is his muse and as a painter, he paints his masterpiece which of course is a portrait of Dorian.  Upon its completion, Basil looks at Dorian and exclaims this portrait will always be a reminder of your perfect youth, every day you will grow older, but this protrait will forever be a reminder of what you were.
    There is no magic spell or incantation, but Dorian gets very upset and staring at the portrait, he declares that he would rather the portrait age and he retain the beauty of youth.  For this, he declares "I would give my soul away for that".  It is not described in the story, but maybe Lord Henry is the devil, as he is a most interesting person with a very perverse sense of how he sees the world.  Either way, the stage is set, and Dorian goes through 20 plus years and his looks retain the grace and beauty of a boy of nineteen.  I say maybe Lord Henry is the devil because he stays best friends with Dorian though his whole life, and even as every other person he knows abandons him, Lord Henry seems unbothered and still finds him charming and beautiful.
    At a certain point, he falls in love with a girl who acts on a stage, Sybil Vane, but she gets affected by love, and loses her zeal for the stage.  Dorian invites his two friends because he is so proud of her genuinely great acting, but when they go to see her perform, she does horribly because she doesn't care about her craft, for she is in love.  Dorian gets mad at her and states that instead of being a genius on the stage, she was shallow and stupid.  He leaves her and in the next day finds she has killed herself.  At this point, the painting has been hanging in his room, and he notices for the first time that the portrait has changed, the face has a visible smirk.  He goes through some guilt and decides that it is best to hide the portrait so it is never seen.  It is put in a room hid from everyone, and there it stays.  He continues on through his mid-40s, still looking boyishly charming.  But every sin scars the portrait more and more.  At a certain point he kills a friend and the picture gets a bloody red tinge.  I don't want to ruin the end, but it is definitely worth the read.
    The story is short, at around 220 pages, and the language used by Lord Henry just flows and itself is very amusing.


             "The moment one sits down to think, one becomes all nose, or all forehead, or
             something horrid.  Look at the successful men in any of the learned professions.
             How perfectly hideous they are!  Except of course in the church.  But then in
             the church they don't think.  A bishop keeps on saying at the age of eighty what
             he was told to say when he was a boy of eighteen, and as a natural consequence
             he always looks absolutely delightful."



My only problem was reading the prologue which mentioned drug use and Dorian going to houses of ill repute, but most of this is brushed off.  He goes to an opium den, but the details are very sketchy.  There have been several rewrites and possibly it was cleaned up in the version we see today.  Back in the day, the author spent time in prison because the story was so morally reprehensible.

2/25/15 Boy Has Flown The Coop?

    Boy has kind of found a way to move out, sort of.  He has friends at Texas State and they have a spare room.  He goes and stays with them 2-3 nights a week already, but so far, he sleeps on the sofa, as a guest.  They offered him the room at a reduced price, since he would only be there during the week.  He mentioned this at the start of the school year.  We kind of liked the idea so he doesn't have to drive on the freeway so much, but it means we don't see him.
    We were kind of ignoring the request by saying we couldn't be paying the $200 a month they wanted, but we also felt a little guilty that our son was staying there anyway.  My mom and dad offered to pay $100 of the amount to help him out.  As soon as we told him this, he started packing his Jeep.  He took an old smaller desk for his PC, a lamp, his PC, two monitors,some toilet paper and some clothes.  He said he was fine sleeping in his sleeping bag until we help get him a bed over there.
    My mom keeps poking me that I should be sad, my baby is moving out, but I see it as a positive thing.  He can now experience more of the university lifestyle, he is no longer miserable like he was when he was attending ACC, and he'll be coming home on the weekends.  He still works at Alamo Drafthouse, he needs to come up to do that.  We'll see how long this lasts.
    I told him, if you end up with shitty grades, you will find yourself back home, and that will be that.  I know they don't party with alcohol and that stuff, but they do get on video game campaigns that go on for hours.  Sometimes, we call at him, and the look on his face, is like he has been awake for two days, all edgy, snapping "what do you want?!?"  He will need to develop some serious self discipline, and quick.
    We kind of started kicking around the idea of selling our house and moving back to our first house. The costs of living in this huge house has me questioning everything right now.  We could potentially take the profits of this house and pay off our credit debt and most of the remaining mortgage of our other house.  We could then be living on my wife's salary, and putting mine away to buy me a Cessna.  I know that is a ridiculous idea, but I still find it interesting.  Boy said if we do this, then he will just stay with his friends full time.  decisions, decisions...

2/24/15 Fruit To Condiment?

    Wife's coworker heard what I did for Chubs with the Pokemon rhyme, she wants one for ketchup, I guess...

Catsup or Ketchup mean the same damn thing

it's a red sauce which on your food will make you feel like a king.

Did you know the word used to mean a generic sauce of mushrooms, oysters, walnuts or other foods?

But now it only refers to a mix of tomatoes, vinegar, sugars, and spices; gross things it excludes.

There is nothing more American than ketchup a burger and some fries

any other combo might be good, but more American?  I say she lies!!!

I will admit I even love ketchup on my tacos in the morning round ten

salsa's too caliente, I lose my meditative state of zen.

But Ketchup is tangy, it can be sweet

put it on meat, and your pallet it will love and greet.

Chickfila now gives you little tubs of ketchup instead of stingy little packets

Oh, I'll hate the day when they figure out how to give us food in tablets.

Bill Miller and Wendy's have that gallon thing you have to go and pump

for some ketchup?  show me the manager, he should be kicked in the rump.

For the house, I love me a Heinz bottle extra large

Wife says generic is the same without the extra charge

I say Grrrr, on certain things I don't like to skimp,

she just says shut it, use some mustard, less calories, you already look like a blimp.

So I must say, ketchup is just fine

but I don't think it will ever mix with fancy foods that you eat with wine.

It's the condiment of choice for blue collar folk

and this my peeps you know I wouldn't dare of make a joke.

2/23/15 Big Fish From A Small Pond Visiting The Ocean?

    My family came up this weekend.  My brother complained like an old man the entire time.  He says he cannot believe we live here with all this traffic.  Then he goes on to say that it is getting hectic back home, they are up to three traffic lights, in a city of about 8000.  Nothing pisses him off more than wasting time in traffic.  I tell him yeah, it's getting bad, but that is the price to pay to live in the big city.
    We tend to stay on the south side of the city, but because they are here, we try to do cool stuff.  Tonight we ended up at Dave and Buster's.  The idea of it is cool, but the reality is that it is loud, overpriced mediocre food, at best.  It was ok for awhile, but by the time we left, I had had enough for a long while.  They used to have the policy when they opened that at a certain point (like 8pm), it was only for 21 and up, but I guess they weren't getting enough money to keep that idiot idea going.  Anyways, food was tasting ehh, until the check came and my brother decided it was his treat, suddenly the food became 10x better.
    Chubs had a great time, he played games from the time we got there til the time we left.  He was killing zombies, and Aliens, and even some exotic wild game.  He wasn't having much luck on the games where you win tickets to trade in for prizes, but he has figured out the prizes are not that great.
    My brother complained when it was time to go because apparently he had called me and my mom and we didn't respond right away.  It was so loud, even if my phone was in my hand and I had seen him calling, I doubt I would have been able to hear him.  But he expected that when he was ready to leave, we would be ready and waiting.  I don't understand this part though, he was in his own vehicle and he has a key to my house, so really, he doesn't need us to get into my house.
    We then sat here at the house and had a fun time listening to him go on and on about how I buy into this liberal lifestyle, I should only have Miller High Life Beer, all those other beers border on an insult to beer makers.  I don't really like beer, but "a man is suposed to drink beer", so I'll buy all sorts of different kinds.  I bought some banana bread flavored beer, I thought was yummy, he said he almost threw up.  I liked one flavored with raspberry, he said no.  Also have one that has mesquite smoked flavor, he said it made him gag.  He said forget all the assorted coolers I keep for our women friends.  He finally found some old Miller Beer cans my dad left behind from a few months back and he drank that as he kept explaining to all of us how the people on House Hunters are all actors.  I love the show, but have to agree that two dopey looking people are not going to have enough funds to afford the $500000 vacation home.
    It was nice to have them here for the weekend, but I do believe this Dude belongs back home in a small town.  His final decree was that his family was gonna be on the road by 830am, even if they are in pajamas because he has to see the Daytona 500 at noon.  I told him who cares, they just go round and round, he just about turns red, says I don't understand the nuance of the sport.  His wife just rolls her eyes, and said if he's being ugly on the road "I'll leave him at Buc-ee's", he can walk home.

2/22/15 Tough Enough?

    "Life is tough, it's tougher if you're stupid."

    Many people think the toughest thing to own is a gun.  That is funny, the toughest thing all of us own, we received when we started turning about one.  I realized this on Thursday after picking up Chubs from school, he got in the car and started from his backdoor to toot.  It didn't stink but it sounded so aggressive, I got scared and said "Dammit boy, that poor underwear is suffering." He said too bad, without skipping a beat, he knew what he signed up for when he decided to be for a kid's butt.  I had to agree, and laugh a little bit, as he kept popping like popcorn strapped in there on the passenger seat.
    Back to why this has to be the toughest thing?  Some of mine I've owned since I was 29.  It just hangs on, doesn't complain, back in circulation it goes again and again.  I don't think cotton was meant to last as long, they sell them at Walmart, it's a commodity, meant to be replaced quite easily.  Some of mine has become classic, like an old 60s Mustang, but without the value.
    I've got a bit of Pervo in me (so of course I wonder), are women as disgusting as men, are some of those thongs doing their duty for ten years on end?  I've made the jokes as most guys will do, I'd love to be her thong for a night, but nevermind if it means having to do it for 5-10 years it would stop being a delight.  Maybe those tiny things self destruct after 1-2 uses, yeah that works to keep my brain from getting confused.  Granny panties, now that's another story, I can believe those things last forever, but not a minute for glory.
    I'm still getting distracted, back to the toughness, Boy will tell me "guns are made of metal, feel the power as they discharge."  I say Boo, that only happens once or twice a year, stand behind your little brother, his butt is constantly dropping bombs and stinking up the room, that underwear survives annihalation at ground zero.  My mind is made up, I can smell a winner, I don't even have to be near, oh dear sniff sniff, that smells like yesterday's dinner.

2/21/15 Pokemon Power For My Chubs

This is for my Chubs who was surprised to hear I can write poetry.

Pokemon Power

Pocket Monster is what pokemon stands for

My Ale bear don’t know that, he just wants more.

His favorite is Charmander, an orange dragon that brings fear near and far

I think if I caught one, I might just keep him in a jar

Personally I think Pikachu is the bomb.

But my son would say, come on Dad, that just sounds dumb.

How about Cubone with his dead mother?

Chubs says he’s lame, don’t even bother.

I always liked Squirtle, a little round and a little cute

Shut up with that Chubs says or I will give you the boot.

Well one day my boy says he’ll be like Ash

Any Pokemon competition he will just crash.

I have no doubt, my boy has the power

Have you smelled his armpits, man he’s a little sour.

2/20/15 Playtime?

    I do not remember being a loud kid growing up.  Chubs has his cousins here and they have been yelling nonstop since yesterday.  It is not the kind of yelling that needs to be gotten after.  They are just playing at a fevered pitch, everything is dramatic and at a life or death moment.  I can't get mad because usually he doesn't have kids to play with, so when he does, it is somewhat unique.
    He had even more cousins here last night, my wife's brother has four kids and they were here last night.  That is a loud atmosphere.  They all grab nerf guns and run up and down the stairs "shooting" each other, with or without nerf darts.  I was sitting on laptop as my wife was trying to carry on a conversation with her mom and repeatedly she'd turn and say "right babe?"  so I would corroborate her story, and every time I'm like I can't hear anything but EEEEEEHHHHH!!!!  kids screaming.
    Growing up, I had my brother and if we were going to play in a crowd, it was outside, there was no running in the house with a gang.  We could scream and carry on, but we were gonna be out in the yard.  We played tag, football, baseball, attempt to fly kites, frisbees... for a couple summers we played this very dangerous game we called war.  My parents had changed the roof on the house and whoever did it, did not pick all the pieces up.  We would take sheets of old shingles and make triangle  frisbees about 2-3 inches in size.  The weight and size was just right to fling at each other.  We have an old storage building behind my mom's house with a flat roof part for a carport.  We would stand up there and taunt neighbor kids then we'd spend hours throwing pieces of shingles at each other.  They would leave an awful welt if one actually hit you.  Usually, it was just a fwit fwit fwit sound as it passed too close for comfort.
    Youth passes too fast, I wish the kids did have a three day weekend every other weekend as this one is.  It is nice, almost gives us a chance to take a deep breath.  We always seem to be in a rush, I was upset a couple days ago at being sent home early, but this weekend has been very nice and laid back.  I slept almost normally Thursday night, got up relaxed and rested Friday and have been having a very clear mind to do some writing and relaxation.  I am laying in bed right now at 5:43pm on a Sunday afternoon.  I never get a chance to do this, thanks to my inlaws who are entertaining Wife.

2/19/15 Old School Fables? 1

    There once was a mighty sun who was worshipped by the brightest lads of the land.  This made the sun very happy, for he loved them and they loved him.  He would talk to his wife the moon how all his boys were growing and shaping the world in his image.  They were full of pride because between the two they felt complete.  Maybe they could never walk the earth, but the men they had helped raise would gladly walk it for them and spread the word of how important the sun and moon were.  There was but one rule the sun had always to follow for his rule to run uninterrupted, don't mettle with the female version of the human.  They are not the same, they are not interested in your science, or your math.  To them, the world spins because fairies work with nature and it is the flapping of butterfly wings that keep the world in balanced harmony.
    This did not settle well with the sun, who was a proud and boastful sun.  He declared "I shall find one fair maiden and upon her spend a great deal of energy, but she will learn and she will see that my way is the right and just way for things on earth as they are in the sky."
    So he happened one day to come across a lonely lass it seemed.  She did declare that she was not afraid of the sun and that she could learn all his lessons.  So the sun thought she seemed like a good candidate, communicated with her for awhile, saw no mistakes in her writing efforts, so she must be sound of mind.
    It wasn't but a day or two that the sun realized the error of his ways, for she had a magic box in her hand, of which all of the world it seems would constantly distract her.  She had friends for a millenia, and unfortunately, also the distractions that go with that.  The sun tried to be brighter and louder, but the box never stopped chirping and calling to the girl.  One day it was to go dancing to celebrate for Harry's birthday, then for Tyrone's quinceanera.  It was never ending, but the sun was determined to stick with it.  I'll do my lessons after I bake cookies with Lizzy, then the next night it was dinner with Sherri.  Of course when there was no chirping on the box, there was work to be done to pay the rent.  There never really was a moment's rest, and thus the sun was forced to fade away.
    Slowly, over many years, the sun decided to listen to the rules that had been set in place.  Tis best to leave the heavy lifting for the men.  I do believe women are man's equal, but their power might indeed come from fairies and flapping butterflies.  As it was, the sun decided he had expended so much energy, he took his first vacation and that is where solar eclipses come from.  It was the moon shielding the sun so he could cry and accept his defeat.

2/18/15 People That Live Like Misers Suck?

    My mother in law was telling us a story about a friend of my father in law.  Apparently, he was a well to do dean who lived on the poverty level.  He drove one after another POS station wagon.  Lived in a small rented house, until the wife passed and the landlord said he had to move out.  Now he is living at a relative's converted garage.  This is a man who was making a six figure salary for over twenty years.  She then filled us in that on their spare time they sold knick knacks at garage sales on the weekends.  Now, in his 60s, he has lost his wife and has nothing to show.
    I understand when this happens with unemployables, people that refuse to work within our American economy.  Their life makes sense, you give nothing, you get nothing.  They of course, tend to whine, bitch, and moan that life is unfair to them, somebody owes them for the fact they got out of bed.  This man is not the same, he worked, he should have money and comfort that comes from said money, he shouldn't make his peers feel pity for him.   That is where the breakdown happens for me.  My FIL is left feeling sorry for him, when in reality this man probably has most of his money socked away in a bank.
    Some of you would say "he has a right to save his money for a rainy day".  Ok, but then life happens and the wife dies, who is he going to enjoy his success with (success being the compensation he got for working a high level job)?
    I just read this past week of a janitor who left $8 million dollars to the local library and hospital, awesome for the library and hospital, not so much for him.  He could have taken some trips, he had family he could have helped.  He made his money investing, and great, but along the way, take a minute and remember why you are trying to make the extra money. 
    Maybe I'm too focused on my family, I don't see a reason to do anything extra if "we" don't benefit.  My only goal is to bring in more money so we can enjoy more out of life.  My job as a parent is to provide for my progeny infecting the world with Gallegos awesomeness.
    On a side note, as my wife was half joking, my father in law's friend will end up remarrying and that wife will end up enjoying all the sacrifices made by the first wife.  She'll be the one with the boob job, and the gaudy gold jewelry, maybe the cheesy convertible.  It's a fine line, I hate a controlling wife, but if this is the alternative, the wife needed to be stronger and tell this mental midget to quit it and spend some money now.  Wouldn't surprise me if this jackass buried his wife in a pine box to save on costs, meanwhile, he's sitting on a million bucks in the bank.

2/17/15 Touch Me And I'll Burn Ya?

    I am the toughest little mofo you ever did meet.  Born of wood, in a low oxygen environment, I shall feel no pain.  My job is but one, to burn hotter, cleaner, longer than any propane can ever tried.  I come with 1000 of my brothers all in a bag, we will die in the service of providing heat and an atmosphere you will reflect upon one day and I do swear I shall be remembered as one of the better "good times".  I feel my time is not long on this earth.  Although I have realized my job is to die for your needs, when the time comes, are we ready?  We prepare in this line of business, but it is still a mess to go into that dark chamber.  Uh-oh, time....
    Chop Chop, get in that grill men!, Form the pyramid of death, so that we all burn and die with honor!!!  Don't you dare try to be a coward, rolling off the grill to die a coward's death in the green vegetation our master has meticulously grown for his enjoyment.
    Now that we are assembled, let's hold hands, come in tight, there is no escape from the inevitable.  We all hear the knife cutting going on with the cutting board, we hear the laughter, the game in the background.  Our time to show our mettle is upon us, bathe in the liquid designed to take us to the peak of our prime.  For one glorious hour, we all shall shine with the intensity of the sun.  Let this be magical, for I have heard tales that flakes of metal fall onto our presence and we may see hews of green among our blue and gold flames.  I hear the spark, prepapre to come alive, because it is only when we are at the precipice of our death that we truly realize how alive we are, Aaagghhhhhh!!!!!
    Wow, all the preparation is not enough for nothing is ever as intense as my whole body lit aflame.  As I sit here like an angry sun, peeling of the layers, slowly turning to ash, I see above me, that my life has not been in vain.  I am burning mighty cow.  I may already be dead and reaching nirvana, but I am aware that my life was not in vain, for I cooked the meal of Texas Kings.  I was given the opportunity to prepare cow meats for these important men folk.  Had my life been taken for some corn on the cobs for some vegetarian hippies, my life might have felt a waste, but no.  This was a feast for the ages, I smell the richness of chicken, and swine as well.  I only hope our name lives in infamy, may we be remembered for our service.  I am not merely a charcoal briquette, I am Kingsford charcoal, the best charcoal money can buy.  Is your meal worth me?

2/16/15 I Might Be A Shitty Parent, But I'm Trying?

    I can't call myself a good parent.  I let my boys stay up late on the weekends, we eat stuff that's probably not good for you, I spoil them in every way possible, but there are worse people out there.  I don't want to stand on a soapbox and preach what is right and wrong, but some things bother me terribly.
    I go pick up Chubs every day after school, this because Boy had friends who would ride the bus and he would tell us the older kids would offer him drugs, or occasionally kick his butt when they got off.  I made the decision that even though it breaks up my sleep (I work nights), I'll go get them after school.  Anyways, we have a good time, we usually eat at one of the local eateries here in Southpark Meadows, we live in South Austin.  What bothers me is some of the other parents just seem to suck.  There is a dad who walks to the school, must live close by, and he has two younger kids.  I don't know if it's a cultural thing or if this guy is just a badass, but he walks about ten yards in front of his kids, sometimes on the phone, but not always.  How are you keeping an eye on the kids when they are not even in your periphery?  The little girl must be two or three, she walks fine, but it makes me nervous.  How is he so sure the kid is going to stay on the curb?  Is he not worried a car slows down and kidnaps the little girl?  He just has buffoon written all over him.  Jackass.
    Another situation I've encountered at the school, again in this after school time slot is the angry parent who decides she is going to yell at the kids assigned to crossing guard duty.  Does it make you feel superior to yell at a ten year old?  Those poor kids aren't getting paid, and they might save your shitty child from some day getting run over.  What's your rush, you gotta get home and finish watching your novelas?  A-hole.
    I also have a problem with parents that overprotect their kids.  I've always said when my kids go off with another family, do what you gotta do, spank his ass if he gets disrespectful.  We have a friend who is always fighting with the school her kid goes to.  Hmmm, if your kid already has a juvenile probation officer, is it possible sometimes, maybe once, that it's your kid that's being the ahole?  Why would an entire school district have it in for your spawn, nobody is that important.  Teachers don't get paid to babysit, they get paid to teach.  Every time we talk to her, "so and so at the school was saying this and that about my kid..., so of course I went in there and yelled at everybody".  Oh that is classy.  She is not a fan of punishing her kids, wants to be friends with them.  Ughhh.
    I love my boys, tell them every day, but I am very firm on the fact that I am not your friend.  I tell them this all the time.  I am your parent, and as much as I love you, I will come down on you with great fury if I find out you are out there being an idiot wasting people's time.  Your job right now is to get as smart as possible so you can be useful to society in the future.

2/15/15 Pride And Prejudice Book 1?

    I finished reading Pride and Prejudice last week.  This is my attempt to open myself up to reading for fun.  I am not sure this qualifies as a fun read.  The characters seemed rather self important and one dimensional.  I failed to see the brilliance or even the verbal sparring mentioned on the back jacket of the book.  Book was twice as long because the Bennet girls are twits.  Jane Austen (author) is considered equal to her contemporaries, book was released in 1813, but I have read much better.

    I had to force myself to finish reading the book.  Three fourths in I was hoping it would start wrapping up story points, to figure out where it was going.  The slutty younger sister (Lydia) commandeered the story of Elizabeth Bennet (story is told through her) and by far gave this story its most interesting details.  Their mom was a piece of work, only interested in suitors that had money or means to raise the family's status.  That is a shitty human being.

    Mr. Bennet is almost a cool interesting person until they start talking about his foolishness and not having enough money to do right by Lydia, who in reality goes off to live a miserable life with a half-ass who does not believe he is suited for work, but I guess he's good looking and that is enough for some people.

    The other sister Jane gets sick and that lasts a long time where she falls ill at the neighbors and they tend to her for days and days.  These are freaking country girls, why are they soo feeble?  They should be tough and ready for whatever the day brings.

    She is interested in Mr. Bingley and he appears interested.  He has the means to rent a farmhouse/estate close to the Bennet family.  He has a friend who appears stuck up, in the beginning can't be bothered by the girls, even for a dance.  Of course he falls for Elizabeth, eventually.  But first, he manages to crush Jane's goood nature by convicing Mr. Bingley that Jane is ill suited for him as a wife.  Without rhyme or reason, they leave the property close to the girls and head back to the big city of London.  The guys would have gotten away except for a plot twist.  Eliza goes on vacation with her aunt and uncle and ends up at Mr. Darcy's where she quickly starts fantasizing that that estate could be hers.  To me, this is when Elizabeth finally starts falling for Mr. Darcy (shallow bitch got interested when she saw the expensive estate).
    At this point, a letter is written by Mr. Darcy that explains a couple things (frankly he could've drawn a picture of a dog), Eliza wants the estate and the riches.  They go round and round for another 60 pages and they live happily ever after.  There was nothing satisfying about watching 3 of 5 spoiled girls get courted and saved by men of means.  But maybe that's how it was back in the day.

2/14/15 Songs That Make You Go Waah?

    How come some songs turn us to slobbery crying messes?  I was only half listening today and I turned it up to Some Nights by Fun.  Song is 2-3 years old.  The lyric part that gets me is:

so this is it.  I sold my soul for this?

Washed my hands of that for this?

I miss my mom and dad for this?

Not even sure why, but those lines tear me up instantly.  Other songs do that too.  How about Alone Again by Gilbert O'Sullivan?  Just the jingle tears me up, but it's a simple song designed to make you cry, left at the alter, contemplating suicide, his dad died, his mom died.  Alone Again indeed.

      Another one that has that one line that hits me is Wino and I Know by Jimmy Buffet.  

And the wino and I know the joys of the ocean,

Like a boy knows the joys of his milkshake in motion

Maybe it's knowing the innocence of the boy is fleeting.  Maybe I envision Chubs doing that and Boy already too old and too cool to just sit in kitchen and be a kid.

    Another Jimmy Buffet song is Captain and the Kid.  This one is about an old man and a grandson I guess, and I can envision my dad retiring from truck driving:

His world had gone from sailin' ships

to rakin' mom's backyard

He never could adjust to land

although he tried so hard

And of course, my wife's favorite song to mess with me, Cat's In The Cradle by Harry Chapin.  I do admit that I work a lot, but if I'm not at work, I am home.  I don't have hobbies or friends I go meet around town.  But she knows the guilt I carry, because of my insistence on working more than normal.  Everyone knows this song, I assume is why I don't even show any lyrics.

    If you feel like a good cry, go ahead, listen to all of them.  If you don't end up with snot running and eyes red, you're probably a cyborg, stick a D size battery in your recharge port.

2/13/15 Who Turned Off The Work?

    I am home on a Thursday night.  Worked a lousy four hours.  I don't feel like I even deserved dinner tonight.  I still ate it, just saying.
    About a year ago, my supervisor had a meeting with me about my hours.  She and management (I'm sure) decided I was working too many hours.  Their genius solution is that I was to work 48 hours the first week and 40 hours the second.  We get paid every two weeks.  She also said I could do it however I saw best to fit my needs.  This after a few years where I was working 48 hours every week, pay cut amounted to a loss of 12 hours if you figure that 8 hours removed were paid at time and a half.
    I should be glad, but maybe I like the abuse, maybe I think a man should work himself to death.  There have been many weeks where I work 72 hours, and I have worked more than that.  Currently, we just dont have a lot of work.  I know work will pick up, but I hate when it happens.  Truth be told, since they pulled me in to tell me this, it has only happened about 3-4 times where I work a forty hour week.  Last check had 60 hours and 70 hours, so maybe I should enjoy the break.
    My strategy is I work the first three nights as I always have, doing 12 hours.  Then on the fourth night, I work four hours unless something hot comes in or we just have a lot of work.  I am still thinking they could call me in tomorrow.
    When you work a 12 hour shift, you get used to stretching things out.  Tonight, when I figured I would be out early, it felt like I never even got started.  I arrived on campus at 515pm, went to gym for 30 minutes.  I started working out again, and have tried to keep to this routine.  I was done by 545 where I then headed to our lab.  By the time I logged on and read my email, it was almost 630.  Email told me I needed to rework some stuff we had attempted just the day before.  I loaded it and proceeded to FIB sample.  FIB slicing is like taking a knife and cutting thin layers off.  This exposes a new face on the material getting FIB'd.
    Between doing this and arguing with my wife that I was coming home early, messing with crappy laptop, and responding to other things on my email, the following three hours passed in blink of an eye.  Had to gulp down second cup of coffee, or it would have gone down sink.
    Anytime this happens, Wife starts with maybe we need to find a roommate, or sell our house and get something smaller.  I know it'll be a different story in 2 weeks, so no point in getting depressed or excited.

2/12/15 Journey Via Hallway?

Hallways are kickass, hallways are cool

If your house has one, chances are you rule.

My childhood house had a hallway seemed miles long when I was four

We'd play football, and variations of hockey when outside it would pour.

Although it seemed wide enough for a car to pass by

always watch for those nails on the baseboard, or it would be time to cry.

Now I look on that hallway and I believe it has shrunk,

not even 3 feet wide, what happened, were we drunk?

My workplace has hallways, they go on for miles in all sorts of directions

I walk them sometimes, for exercise, hopefully avoid those type 2 diabetes injections.

Because I work nights and I'm about the only one here

they keep most of the lights off in the hallways which can make the ends seem to disappear

I am not scared, I tell myself I'm brave,

walk through the dark fat-ass, losing weight is what you crave

Even my workstation is only lit by the computer screens

don't turn too fast, that's a dark hallway and you know nobody will hear your screams

I'm safe, I know, I got a couple of geriatric security guards keeping an eye on the place

if stuff goes down they'll race down said hallways, and find justice with a bottle or two of mace.

But wait, my current house has no hallways and that doesn't seem right

We've been tricked with "open concept", stupid realtors, who do I bite?

Downstairs you go from room to room, never thought that was too bad

But a hallway makes even that small trip seem special, now I might just get sad.

Upstairs, there's four bedrooms connected by a walkway, but the other side opens to rails

so no, don't call it a hallway or I'll kick you and your hubby in your tails.

Maybe this is what breaks the camel's back, the real reason that we move

Give me a long hallway, so my life can finally be smooth.

2/11/15 House In The Hills?

    "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it."

    We killed a Sunday afternoon by going for a country cruise.  I could not do this without having some sort of point, so we went looking for houses.  I am almoost trying to convince myself that we need to move, of course, after hearing a friend of mine talking about getting a new house built.  I hate the idea of moving, it is a huge pain, but people do it all the time.
    Our country cruise took us towards The Salt Lick in Driftwood and the community was Rim Rock or something like that, all acreage homesites, but also all above the $400,000 point.  Those houses were beautiful though, with outdoor kitchens in the patios overlooking open hill country, or crazy layouts with wings in the house for the kids to hang out in their own "living rooms" outside their bedrooms.  I loved that house, instantly, but it was over $550,000.
    We went out there because there was a housebuilder out there building on I-35 with a plan that includes an apartment as part of the house.  Wife loves this idea to keep Boy around longer.  It has its own kitchen, washer/dryer, living area and bedroom, along with a bathroom.  This is the kind of idea that would get my wife excited about moving.  I found the rest of the house a tad small, but still liked the idea.
    As much as I would love the idea of living in the hill country, it would take me over an hour to get to work, and that is too far for me.  It would make my wife's commute even farther, so it is just a dream for now.  But maybe someday.
    Wife started on about the prices, my thought is what do you expect?  People are not going to stop coming from out of state, there is a limited amount of land, prices can't do anything but go up.  We at least have two properties in town.  I am starting to think, maybe even our starter home could one day sell for $200k.  I might be fantasizing right ow, but it is very much in town, only two miles or so from Ben White.  Most new building is going on in the surrounding cities, there just isn't much space here in Austin.
    We'll see, I am not going to jump into anything right now.  We are in a good position, so I think we'll wait and see.

2/9/15 Name Brands Are Committing Suicide?

    I went to the mall today in hopes of buying a couple of shorts.  Maybe my big butt enjoyed the holidays too much, or maybe my clothes have all of a sudden decided to start shrinking, either way, new clothes were the solution.  I cannot believe the prices companies like Polo are trying to sell clothes at.  Shirts had an original MSRP of $98.00.  What are these people smoking that they can put these shirts out with those prices and keep a straight face.  I don't want to hear BS that the style is ever changing, or they are using the latest generation materials, and the costs are passed along to the consumer.  Old Navy or even crap you buy at Walmart is made on the same planet, and probably by the same third world countries.
    I don't buy clothes for me, but once a year, maybe.  My boys, I keep looking nice and I don't pay too much attention, specially with Boy, who is a little bit of a tool and prefers Affliction and certain brands, as long as black is the main color.  Chubs is still too young, so he'll wear whatever we buy him.  I remember this summer telling Boy get some nice shoes, and I ended up talking him into some Ecco Boots, he loves them, says they're comfortable all day long.  They were also $245.  I looked at them, and thought, I can't spend that kind of money on me.  That's crazy.  I wear Crocs pretty much every day, and I do want to stop dressing so slobby, but it is a hard habit to break.
    The only way to beat these companies is to buy their wares when they go on sale.  Luckily, we live in Texas, the weather is pretty constant, so we don't make great changes in going from winter to summer.  They think they are getting rid of their winter fashions, jokes on them, I have no fashion, I'll wear whatever, whenever.  As long as the sleeves roll up.  So here we are.  Shirts originally going for $98.00, were on sale for $49.00 and then 40% more.  I paid $29.40 per shirt.  Suck it Polo, suck it hard.  I bought a couple and I'm sure I'll wear them for 5-10 years.  Unless I get more massive, let's blame global warming on that.
    I also bought some pants, new idea for me.  Not sure I am going to carry through with this idea, but I was a Boy Scout and our motto was Be Prepared.  Finally, I will have more than one pant in my closet I could theoretically wear, if I ever have to dress like a grown up.

2/10/15 My Wife, The Giant?

My wife is a giant, but she's only five foot three

once she starts yelling she makes the three of us flee.

She makes quite a stir of having powers like a witch,

starting to believe after many a session where my innards are in a snitch.

I have seen her eyes vibrate like she's rabid or insane

this again to demonstrate we live in her domain.

I love this woman, but she requires no things

sucks on her birthday, she'll say don't buy me crap, not even rings.

I'll try to tempt her, maybe another purse,

women love them, not mine, she threatens to put me in a curse.

How about some chocolates for my plump and lovely lady,

she'll say why? you acting pretty shady.

Ooh, some sunglasses, yours are looking old

stop it Fatboy, you're not made of gold.

Yes, this little giant is a Grinch when it comes to buying herself stuff

we know she's just pretending when she tries to act so tough.

A better human than me, I would say by at least ten times

remembers even birthdays on my family's side, and reminds me with little signs.

She will argue and be dramatic with the two knuckleheaded boys

but come time for rewards she's always on my side to get them new toys.

She really is an old school gal trapped in a modern world,

loves her man with a passion that leaves her fists curled.

I don't doubt she would kill or worse for the three Boys that make up her life

I am glad she's mine, I love you, I'm honored to call you my wife.


Happy Birthday Babe!!

2/8/15 The TV Tide Has Turned

    It wasn't that long ago when it was a given that the man in the TV relationship was the buffoon and comedy spewed from how badly he performed in life.  Cue Married With Children, King of Queens, Homer on Simpsons, The Flintstones, maybe even that 70's Show.  Funny and long running shows in which the woman was a fountain of knowledge and the man was usually the butt of the joke.  Oh, King Of Queens bothered me because the hot chick never even convinced me she liked Kevin James that much.  Every episode was her demeaning him, and ended with him going out of his way to prove his love and loyalty to the megalomaniac.
    Homer is a cartoon, but it is also a show that has been on TV for more than 25 years. I haven't seen every episode, but most every episode I see has him bumbling his way out of a bad situation.  Fred Flintstone was very much the same way.  I loved that cartoon growing up though.
    Maybe Married With Children was the start of this wave, they did have to be different to get people's attention and it did work, as I have read that the show was primarily responsible for launching and keeping FOX going in the beginning.  That 70's Show had an awesome dad in Red Foreman, watch out, he'll put a foot in your ass.  He acted like a tough guy, and complained like a champion, but he did love those kids and Kitty always got the best of him.
    The point of this blog is that now we are noticing the mom character being treated like she has flaws, which was impossible a few years ago.  We've noticed it on The Middle, The Goldbergs, Modern Family, and this newest one Fresh Off The Boat which put it all together for me.
    The Middle is a good show, but the mom borders on being slow.  She got left behind from a train in the last episode, constantly surprised her kids have school activities which require effort at home, and the husband usually just stands around looking at her scurry about.  Modern Family does the same thing but starts with the mom knowing everything and trying to explain to the camera how much she keeps the family going, but then goes too far, and things fall apart because she tries too hard.
    The Goldbergs is a new show, but instantly became one of my favorites, it has Wendi Mclendon-Covey who was great on Reno 911 as a sexy/slutty cop.  She has toned down the cleavage but goes after protecting her kiddos like a crazed gorilla.  She has had no problem playing the butt of the joke while the husband looks for his comfortable chair to sit on.
    Fresh Off The Boat might be from the same people who do Goldbergs, Mom again is over the top crazy.  She goes as far as hunting down some kids who dined and dashed on husband's restaurant so they go back and pay, proving that people are good, like hubby thinks and not evil like she assumes the world is.  She holds her kids captive in her efforts to make them better than the competition.  She is playing the "Tiger Mom" before the tiger mom was defined, since the show is based in the 90's.
    I find this refreshing.  It bothered me that the man who in many of these shows goes out and competes in America for his job and salary, then goes home and can't be trusted to boil water.  This is just the pendulum swinging,  at some point, some women's group will complain at how women are portrayed and the butt will again be placed on the man.

2/7/15 Meat My Grill?

    We finally grilled again.  It had probably been two months, I don't know how so much time passed being that we love some grilled meat.  I think it was a combination of the holidays, crappy weather, then the constant OT which has run me a little ragged at times, but I am always glad for it.  In this day and age it isn't just a matter of throwing some steaks and being done with it.  I like me some variety, even though by the time BBQ gets slathered on everything, it all winds up tasting the same.
    For Super Bowl Sunday we grilled chicken breasts, sausages, winnies for Chubs, baked potatoes, jalapeño bombers, pork strips, and beef boneless ribs.  We got started late because we forgot the bacon for the bombers and had to go to Target after we spent an hour at HEB.  It is normal for us to be eating around 9pm, but for the Super Bowl we were eating by 8pm.  This was about time for the start of the 4th quarter.  The game was actually good, the commercials, kinda sucked.  Who wants to be at a party and bring up the discussion of kids dying in accidents?  Thanks no name insurance, go back to oblivion.
    For the record, I am not a fan of BBQ sauce, Wife suggested it and the bottle did not go easy through that good night.  I am breaking in a new grill and I am not impressed with its size.  Boy very generously gave our last grill to his friends, I suggested they could have it after I saw them trying to salvage an old one some other family put out to throw away.  Mine was so big, I figured these boys will talk about it, and never actually take it.  It was gone the next day.  I didn't realize for two days that I was but half a man, with no ability to burn meat outside.  I promptly went to remedy this, but in October the selections are few and far between.  I'll look at upgrading sometime in the spring.  We've been in this house eight years in May and I've gone through about 4 grills, so no big whoop.
    The game threw everything up in the air as well.  I like throwing in a pack of "sweetbreads" on the grill, they are a delicacy, should be tried by all at least once.  With a little mustard, awww, nothing better.  We went to a white HEB, didn't want to waste time going east of I-35 for them, oh well.  They were not being sold for awhile, when the whole mad cow scare was in full blaze, but they are back in stores, I am just assuming they are OK. 
    We also couldn't find wings, which we've been doing a lot this year, Chubs loves them.  Like I said Super Bowl's fault.  But if it weren't for the big game, we probably would not have grilled, so the Super Bowl giveth and the Super Bowl taketh.  We are but sheep, who follow what our corporate overlords tell us to consume.  Baaah! Baaah!  Should try some sheep on the grill next time.
   

2/6/15 My Dad, Last Of The Cavemen?

    My Dad is a good man, he spent most of our youth in a truck, providing as a man is supposed to.  I was never impressed with his parenting skills, as he was more concerned with making sure we had what we needed and a little more than bedtimes or discipline.  As an adult, I am now appreciating him more, it is not easy being a father.  There is a fine line between what we do, what we'd rather do, how we do, and ultimately, is our contribution a plus for the kids.
    My Dad is from the era where he served voluntarily in Vietnam.  He signed up when many of his friends talked of going, I guess he figured first in, first out.  After signing though, most of his compadres, his bros, put on their pink little dresses and chickened out.  My Dad did his tour, like a man.  We have some great pictures of him holding a mortar launcher, his weapon of choice for bringing freedom to the enemy, 'merica, fuck yeah!
    Seriously, he would not speak of his time there, my mother would talk of the nightmares when he came back.  It took a long time before he acclimated back.  So nice our government still sees fit to send our young men to free shitty countries for capitalism, when those countries own people won't do for themselves.
    Back to him, he did make growing up more fun.  I felt complete, having friends with only a mom and stuff like that.  Plus he was great to go to the store with, every Sunday was Barbacoa time if he wasn't working.  We'd go to the store, he always bought too much, throw in those cakes they used to sell in the bread section and whatever else he thought we needed.  He wasn't like my mom, worried about veggies and stuff good for you.  He was and still is like a kid.  He's a diabetic, but don't get him near candy bars, he'll out eat you.  My mom would lovingly call him the vacuum cleaner, he'd eat anything we left behind on our plates if it was edible.  I have gladly taken on the family tradition.
    He was the master of the cookout.  Not gonna say he was a great cook, but he never met a piece of meat he wouldn't burn outside.  When we would grill, he always set up a slow cooker and as the meat was done getting that "blackened" quality, he'd chuck it to the slow cooker and onto more meat.  Always made so much, that there'd still be some in the fridge the following weekend.  I'm sure he's still at it, I just live too far to experience it more than once or twice a year.
    My complaints are few but he always talked about fishing, yet we only went a very few times.  I always felt he could've taken us more often.  When I was able to, I bought a boat, which we used every time they would come up to Austin.  For a few years we went a bunch of times, but he has gotten older and I am not the best at maintaining all my stuff.  I need to just go and get me a new boat, maybe in honor of Dad.
    I could go on and on, but you get the point, he's a man, men weren't made to kiss ouchies, that's mama's domain.  Now that I am grown, I understand him better.  Men require solitude, otherwise we start becoming what our wives want, another woman to help in the house.  I get my dad now.  He always gave mom his check, but he'd find a way to keep a little for himself.  I feel a need to do this now.  I have no plans for the money, but when Chubs needs lunch money, or a coworker asks to break a $100, a man can and should be able to do that without asking wifey if it's ok.
    Thanks Dad.  Your life lessons were different than Mom's.  Where she was concerned in making us people that would and could live amongst civilized society, you quietly remind me to nurture and take care of my inner animal.  Don't get so caught up living to society's norms that you forget what you are, an animal that has learned to wear pants and take what needs to be taken.  I know that to be a man sometimes we do things that identify us as crazy, but that is what makes us interesting.  People don't always get us, and that is alright.  Family will always be our first priority, but we do take a minute or two to look within and feel that inner beast content with our definition of a life well lived. I love you for always being you, Grumpy Old Man.

2/5/15 Hollywood, Where Art Thou?

    What has happened to the movies?  I used to get excited about idea of going to the movies.  It was something we did quite a bit when we were first married.  I even tolerated Wife needing bucket of popcorn and we would share a jumbo soda (she would get a sip, I would drink rest, still sharing) and Boy would get the kid's pack with some nachos or a hot dog.  It was fun, we'd go during the week, or a matinee, I even remember going to the crappy dollar theater, it was on Ben White somewhere.
    Rewind to seven years ago, we were in Florida on vacation and went to see one of the big summer blockbusters, maybe the first Transformers in a theater that also served food.  OMG, I think that experience ruined regular movie going for me.  Sure, I remember coming out kinda complaining that the whole affair had been close to $100 for the four of us, but it was awesome.  Waiters bringing food, keeping our drinks full, a table between the rows to keep people even more separated, nirvana.  We finally found the experience here in town at the Alamo Drafthouses.  I would hear people talking of the place, but I don't really drink and that is what they would say "you can eat and have a beer".  Great, I want to watch movies with my family and some drunks.  When we finally went, one opened close enough to the house, on Slaughter Lane, it was a gamechanger.
    The other theaters became extinct to me.  We did go and watch 21st Jump Street with friends when it came out, but it was like going to a football game, people were rowdy in the theater, our friends themselves were on their phones almost throughout the movie.  It was really a contrast to watching a movie at Alamo Drafthouse.  They taunt you in the beginning, go ahead, take your phone out, see how fast we throw you out.  People are quiet and serious about their movie watching.
    To make things even better, last summer, Boy got a job there.  Not only do they pay well, he gets perks, like getting us in for free, and our food is like 50% off.  We can go the four of us, all of us eat a burger or pizza, drinks, popcorn and a pretzel or two and the bill comes out to about $50.  Can't beat that.  Only problem is Boy has become one of those movie nazi types.  He does not have a problem shushing mom and dad if we make a comment during the movie.  And don't laugh too hard, he might fill out a card himself to get the attendants to remove you.
    First time he took us I thought oh man, we'll be here all the time now, but really, he has only taken us maybe 6 times, that's less than once a month.  He does have friends and the little Crapper does seem to prefer taking them, and that's ok, like I said, there just aren't many movies I do want to see, plus they come out so fast, before I realize, they are on DVD and we just order them through Netflix. I just love first world problems, waah, I watch most of my movies at home.  Poor me, poor us.

2/3/15 My Mema Rocked!!

I write this on the request of Wife, I felt it might be disrespectful somehow, but she insists it is how you saw her, it can't be wrong.  It has been seven years today that she passed.  The last paragraph is just injecting a little humor Mother.


    Mema was my the term for both grandmas actually, but here I am referring to my mother's mother.  She was divorced while I was very young, and although this would have diminished the light and shine of lesser people, this only seemed to make her stronger and bolder.  She became our Matriarch, and she had no problemo busting balls and saying what needed to be said.  I totally loved this about her.  I hate people that pussyfoot around a topic, say what needs to be said, you'll feel better.  While in the hospital on her last days, I remember visiting her and a roomful of family, I go to kiss her and she very matter of fact said "Junior, cut that ridiculous thing from your face, it looks like a vagina is on your chin."  Uh, you're right grandma, I'll take care of it.  I had been trying to grow my beard long, it just wouldn't go past a certain point.  She never meant us any harm, but she said what she said.
    When I was going to UT, and basically a starving student, Mema would always have a case of cereal, or a block of ham or cheese.  She worked in the cafeteria, lets just say she bought the stuff, but it really helped get me through some lean times.  My parents were helping too, but they had three other kids and my sister was up to her eyeballs in ballet folklorico dresses and lessons and cheerleader stuff and on and on.  It was very nice, Mema would pull me aside, give me $20-$40, now realizing she was probably sacrificing her fun money for me.
    I remember visiting her a few times in the main cafeteria, and even with all the other twenty ladies cooking, she'd yell something and poof, we'd have a plate to eat there on her office table.  She was born to lead.
    I loved the way she could make my Mom and her sisters all shake in their shoes.  But not her baby boy though, my uncle farted lavender and burped poetry in her eyes.  This was a 6'5" 400 pound angel who fluttered about on silk wings to her, never you say he did wrong.  Maybe she was tougher on the gals, cause I never felt anything but love from her.  I'd go and visit, razz her a bit, and she'd just say "ay Junior!!" and point me to some leftover food to eat.  She is probably the only one who could get under my Mom's skin, in a matter of seconds too.  I always thought it entertaining.  She knew what she did, after getting either my Mom or one of my aunts to submit, she'd be there in a sing songy "ejelejeleeje", and time for a cigarette.
    From my eyes, my Mom was top alpha dog, until grandma showed up. She was no little old lady with the hunched back, if she was going out of the house, careful cause she was packing heat.  At a certain point she showed us a revolver she carried, just in case.
    I know I say I am atheist, but if I am wrong, I have no doubt she will have argued with the big Guy to make sure I get up there with the rest of the family, and like I say, she was and is a lady that gets stuff done.  Conversely, if she is down there, I am sure she will have taken over and will have a hot tub waiting for me, at a comfortable temperature, and a tray of burritos, pizza squares, and of course, on Thursdays, hamburgers.  Cause Thursdays should always be hamburger day.  Love you Mema.

2/4/15 Greenbelt The Betrayer?

    Our house is pretty nice, even had the opportunity to buy with the back to a "greenbelt".  This term is a realtor fancy word for crappy land in a flood zone.  If you live in a big fancy community and they build-in a golf course, said course is camouflaging all the flood zones and helping the builder make lemonade out of lemons.
    We have a creek in our greenbelt, last I looked it looked like you could travel on it with a canoe or maybe a kayak.  Not sure how far you could get, but as far as we walked along it, there is water that appears to be maybe 15-20ft wide and I would say 6-10ft deep.  I haven't gone to look at it in a year or so, but that was the condition last I looked.  This then has a nice paved walkway, followed by an open space where me and Chubs have thrown footballs and frisbees.  This is also where the old roadway to I guess a farmhouse is still paved.  And then throw in a gazebo to make the scenery just perfect.  Of course this made me want to buy the house even more.
    But life has a way of being a cruel bi-otch.  It is not happy little families that go and use the gazebo on any given afternoon, it is the stoner crowd from the nearby high school, who uses it as the perfect place to light up.  Many times we've seen the cops and truancy officers drive up on MY beloved greenbelt to bust these empty headed hooligans.  Then at night we have the pleasure of seeing an assortment of bums gather from the woods.  Where is the soylent green solution when you need it?
    If this wasn't bad enough we then get the people walking precious Fido.  I have no problem with that, my problem is that their passing by gets the dogs of my neighbors barking, and then it is like dog tourettes.  If dog barked and stopped 10 seconds later, I wouldn't care, it's the mechanical half-ass bark every 4 seconds for the following 5 minutes.  Then another dog passes and whole thing is repeated.  I work nights, so I am trying to sleep during the day, the insulated curtains have helped, but damn do I hate dogs.
    Finally, a couple of vatos have figured out they can drive their car into the greenbelt to make out with Maria or whoever they picked up.  I say vatos because primered and lowered cars are the mark of my brown people.  These guys are all about the quicky cause they are never back there for more than 10-15 minutes.
    I work so much though, that I guess it's nice somebody enjoys our greenbelts.  We've lived here going on eight years, and I have fished out there once.  I did have the idea if we ever move to advertise our house as waterfront.  Maybe some crazy Californian will buy me out for 1 million dollars!!!

2/2/15 Boo To The Commercials?

    Saw the Super Bowl earlier tonight, and I did not care for the ads, which are usually over the top entertaining.  Honestly, missed the first quarter and maybe all the funny stuff happened in the beginning, but that commercial with the kid who won't ever marry was a freaking downer, who uses a "dead kid" on a million dollar ad?  Blahh.
    Then there was the McDonald's commercial saying you can pay with a hug to your family, sappy much, waah.  It seemed to go on and on.  With uncomfortable "I love u, Mom" while the creepy cashier stares at you.  Ughh, I'll just avoid McDonald's until after Feb14.
    How about the super Dad who is driving his little girl and she is gradually growing up, looks like a car commercial, he'll hand off the Prius after 10 years or whatever, but no.  They arrive at the airport and she has joined the army.  Great.  We've run out of guys to enlist, now we'll continue with the female population.  Nothing wrong with that, but come on, these commercials just had Wife and I crying.
    I missed the Nissan commercial, but anytime they play Cats In The Craddle, it's not good times for Daddy.  Just saw it on Youtube and goddammit, it is another sappy mess.  That one I do not get the point, there are better ways to make a living if you want to be close to your kids.
    How about the Godaddy.com commercials?  They used to be aimed at the 13 yr old boy in all of us with the half-naked girlies bouncing around, this year they went with the upstart young company owner working diligently over his paperwork trying to make sure his company was poised for success.  Poppycock!  Where's the cliche champagne bottles exploding over the girls as they await their bubble baths in writhing ecstacy?
    Best commercials were Liam Neeson being all Liam Neeson to some kid who beat him on a video game.  I also liked the Nick Offerman advertising for Nascar and I don't even like cars going round and round.
    Maybe Adam Carolla missed it by a few years, judging by these commercials, we are already all a bunch of chicks.  The football game itself made up for the lousy bunch of commercials, it was very good.

2/1/15 Be My Valentine?

    I like holidays, but Valentine's Day is pretty lame.  Here we are, yet again.  Maybe it's because I have never been romantic, or I don't believe a heart shaped chocolate box proves much of anything, other that I will eat most of the chocolates before Wife decides to try one.
    We are just past Christmas, idea of going out for an expensive gift at mall seems crazy.  Yet a heart shaped box from Walmart seems half-ass.  What to do, what to do, oh, gather a bunch of crappy small things and blitzkrieg the wife.  By the time her phone calender reads Feb15, it'll be too late to realize I avoided jewelry, shoes, sunglasses, or anything expensive.
    I think I have been so lackluster about it, that now my wife has taken over, she usually does a romantic meal at home, we eat by candlelight, even the boys get in with some Welch's fizzy grape juice instead of champagne.  This has been our tradition for years, this year I think she's figured any excuse is a good reason to go back to the Brazilian Steakhouse.  Since we discovered this place, a couple years ago, we've been cheating on Outback Steakhouse who was our favorite for the longest time.  We have a reservation for four, I love that place, 9pm.  My mouth salivates at the thought.  She told Chubs jokingly just the two of us were going and he almost cried, "but Mom, you know that's my favorite place to eat, you can't leave your little boy home alone."
    Wife can get carried away.  In the past, boys have gotten gifts like it's Christmas all over again.  Maybe I should try harder.  Last year, I ran to Walmart the morning of Valentine's and got the cliche box of chocolates, a picture frame that had a heart in it, and maybe a card with $20.  I don't know, but we got past it.  I was working last year, this year it falls on a Saturday, so maybe given it's a weekend, we'll make more of a party.
    I should get the hot tub ready, we're coming into the Spring, and I love sitting out there for extended periods of time.  Sometimes we'll get in hot tub and lose 6-7 hours before we come out.  We've been in there til 5am with friends in the past.  If anything, I'll make the effort, for us, and get that bad boy running.  I had put it out of commision because of the cold weather, but it is looking like Spring is coming without hardly any freezing days.