I'll admit that I have periods where I am cranky or even bitchy, but it is always temporary, I generally have a good to great life so it is rare for me to stay upset too long. I thought of this Napoleon thing as I was standing behind the corn on the cob man at HEB. I dropped off Javalina and headed off to Academy for a pump to inflate our balls, I found my old pump was slashed along the hose. It is possible it got old and brittle or one of my little shits did it. Either way, the pump was over ten years old, so I went and bought a new one. I thought it would be nice for me to go to HEB and get a bunch of breakfast material to be ready for Saturday and Sunday morning. Walking around, I figured we BBQ most Sunday afternoons, so I also got meat for that. I got potatoes, but they can be meh, sometimes. I was going to get corn on the cob which comes out delicious on the grill, but no. Juan and Maria had a cart full of corns and they about ran away when I approached. I looked through what they left behind but nah, just the shitty corns.
Fast forward 5-10 minutes later and I am trying to choose a line to pay and they all had a couple people except where Juan was trying to pay for his corn. Little 5'5" Juan was trying to get the discount sale price of corns at 3 for a $1, instead of the normal 2 for a $1. His Wife had run away but he was standing firm and demanding he get the sales price. I had already gotten all my groceries off my cart as his were all in his, I thought he was about done. I have the worst luck choosing lines to pay. No matter where we go, I will stand behind the person who just discovered money, or he is still holding on to his checkbook and writing checks, or after being rung up decides he is going to send his kid to get one more thing. There we stood, maybe fifteen minutes before a manager came and approved the sale, which sucks, because this jackass took corn which I might have enjoyed. More unsettling was Dick, this employee who had the look of my brother in law, love the guy, but he has that look like he's never wrong. This little man (also a short guy), wanted to argue for the customer that we had just sold some corn to a lady at 3 for a $1, so what was the big deal. The big deal, Genius, is that now nobody else gets to enjoy your "loss leader" or whatever you call the discount items to get people through the door. He was mouthing off as my milk and meat were all getting warm, thanks, like he was fixing to benefit from the corn transaction.
He finally paid and went back to the Chocolate Factory or wherever short people work, and I was next. The clerk asked how I was doing, I had to say "better if I could have gotten some corns, Jackass took all of the good ones." I laughed it off and said I was fine just in time for Dick to show back up. Not sure if he was a manager being nosey or a bagger being lazy, he carried himself like he was 10ft tall, but he was dressed like the other baggers. He then proceeded to cut off my conversation with the guy when he saw my cinnamon rolls. The cashier said "ooh warm those up for a minute and aah, Heaven." Dick, of course made out of concrete, retorts "why? If you heat it up, the frosting is going to melt." He had a very passive aggressive tone, like I impregnated his wife or something, I just thought where is the love for me, little guy? You were defending the Helote man a second ago. As I paid and he helped put the last things in my basket, he told me "enjoy those cinnamon rolls..." I could hear "Fatboy" in the way he said it. I said "that was the plan."
I kind of believe this Napoleon Complex thing, when I was at UT, my roommate was a tad short, and oh man, did he have a short fuse. Every time he got drunk, we were holding him back from wanting to fight this or that person that had disrespected him or whatever. I just felt like I was dealing with the same type of hard head.
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