About a month ago, Boy decided he needed new boots and to be different, he said he would buy the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Boots. I thought I was just walking along for the ride, but upon checkout he got all suave and lured me in with how about I pay half and you pay half? Ehh, I figured at least it's a step in the right direction. The only problem was that he needed size 11 and we would have to get them mailed to the house. I didn't like this, but Boy gets stuff mailed to him almost daily sometimes. We paid our halves, him paying $80 and I of course $80 plus taxes. This was when Chubs was still with Wife in Crystal City, so when he saw them, he decided it would be cool to also get a pair.
We went back to the mall to see which ones to get, there are four Ninja Turtles, after all. As luck would have it, and even though Boy is ten years older, they both wear size 11 and they were still out. I said ok, if big bro can get his by mail, so can you. I paid the full amount this time, because Chubs doesn't work, little Moocher. When we got them home, of course we noticed how pretty and ooh and aah, but when he tried to put them on, they wouldn't fit. I kind of forced him to do it again and I got his foot in, but he was in pain. We finally said forget it, and just threw our hands up. Wife said "just give them to Boy." Boy, of course, has no problem taking free stuff. Yesterday, he finally tried them on and he was surprised they fit him so tight. He very dryly said "they're the wrong size, I needed 11s." I looked at the tongue, and first of all, this is the United Fucking States Of Fucking America, we don't need the shoe size in Europe and why do men and women have different sizes? We should all be on the same system, women if you got a cow foot, calling it a smaller size ain't making it cuter. I wear a 13, if I see a heel in a size 13, it should be made for my foot, I don't understand why we play these games. There were four different sizes on the tongue, I get why Chubs would have been confused. The Purchase order said size 11, I never looked at the shoe.
Oh well, instead of just eating it like we do on so many other things, I decided to make it right by returning the shoes. Turned out, Chubs couldn't even wear them to school, so it becomes a harder pill to swallow. The girl working for Journeys quickly started pushing a new pair of shoes, but since I know Chubs is already forced to swap shoes daily for gym (he's wearing Nike shoes and Doc Martens on alternating days), I said no thanks. She tried talking me into re-ordering the right size, I said "nope, this is why I don't trust online stuff." She apologized a couple times, I said no problem, he'll need shoes later, we'll get them then. She said she would be there.
I hated the whole exchange there. The taking stuff back to the mall, but those shoes were not going to help nobody. He has another pair of black Nikes, but they have a red tongue and according to the school dress code, he can't wear them. We bought these on a closeout, no exchange deal at JCPenney, so we are out $40. Maybe Chubs can wear them outside of school, or maybe I can give them to my father. I do feel pretty good though, returning the shoes is like paying down an extra $162 or something like that to the credit card.
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