3/22/16 Dealing With Death?

    I think we are all a little uncomfortable with death, but it comes to all of us, when it is time.  Yesterday, our closest friends here in Austin lost their father.  He had been dealing with complications of COPD, a lung disease.  Funeral arrangements are set for this week, and although it sucks for me to act like a human, I will flip myself over and miss a day of work.  The silver lining for me is that missing Thursday night leads into the extended Easter Weekend, which the boys and Wife were already going to be off on Friday for.
    I felt a little sad for their dad, or Girlie's Grandpa.  He lost his Wife back in 2006, shoot, almost ten years ago.  When a couple is together that long, it seems weird to consider one without the other.  He popped up here and there.  One time, pulling out of an HEB I rarely go to, I ran into him walking, I stopped and said hi.  He always recognized me, but he always made a funny face, like he was surprised or startled by me.  The last time I saw him, he had just got back from living in Corpus Christi for a couple months or something.  He was at our friend's front yard, smoking a cigarette, I believe.  I got off my truck and said hi, I always liked him, he seemed like a hard working simple man.
    The situation makes me think about my own mortality.  I don't think I want to outlive Wife.  I am not really cut out for anything other than working.  Wife can barely put up with me, when we have extended days off.  I don't think I could find someone else I could be comfortable enough to be myself.  I can't even cook for myself.  I would be living on cereal and tuna all over again, like when I was going to school, and living with a roommate.  I can grill, could most meals be prepared outside?   
    I kind of worry about the same thing with my dad.  He depends a lot on my mom, just because he is kind of an ass too.  We've jokingly had the conversation, he says he would spend all his money in the casinos, I would say that is fine if he could pace himself and make it last until his last months, but knowing how things work, he'd blow all his money in a month or two and then we'd be playing hot potato between the kids in taking him in for a couple of months until he would drive us nuts.
    I guess with that in mind, my dad should just keep smoking, while my mom keeps working.  She looks and acts 10-20 years younger than him.  I'll keep getting fatter, making sure I stay ahead of Wife in the overweight department.  If I gotta make sure I go first...