12/17/15 Nothing Nada Rien Nichts Ничто́ Niente

    That is exactly what the Grinch known as Wife says we are exchanging with each other.  We are closing this week on our refinancing efforts and now she wants to be good.  She historically has been hard to shop for, my turtle in a box, does well with a little lettuce and a squirt of water.  Now we have written a treaty, no gifts.
    It has always sucked getting her gifts, no clothes, "I have to try it on."  Her mom worked in a jewelry store for ten years, whatever watch she wears was the last one her mom bought her.  Pearls, you would think, no, she has some from her grandma that are special to her.  I try sticking to purses, they are an accessory women like, but it has to be small, and it has to have the strap to fit around her, because she doesn't want it slowing her hands down.  Make-up?  I wouldn't know where to start.  She doesn't wear perfumes.
    Me on the other hand, I love stuff, as long as it is good shit.  I was thinking of a light bar for my truck, since it is new and it's the kind of truck that will always look good.  Originally, I wanted the deal they offer at the car wash, about $500, I can take it in anytime to wash for a year.  It is next to a couple places we eat in Southpark Meadows, it could get washed while we eat lunch, great since we can't wash it at home.
    How about a new bed, we bought a stupid foam type that conforms to your body?  That is fine, except the material is just hot, and in order to maintain the warranty, we must protect it from water, so we sleep on a waterproof plastic sheet, probably the real heat culprit.  Since there are no springs in the mattress it also does not assist in the all important humping category, knees just sink in, you're on your own.  My shoulders always hurt, not sure if it is the bed or just my big ego getting harder to maintain up daily.
    I kept the window open, we can still get stuff that'll fit in our stockings.  Cough cough, a Rolex would fit.  A hoochie mama with giant boobs would also fit if she wore the stocking and stood on one foot.  I shall remain optimistic until the 26th, then it's time to reset the clock to next year's Christmas.

Light Bar on top