Home Depot Made Me Do It
I go in, buy some wood, then command "I'll make it fit!"
I'm doing it old school, like I'm freaking Bob Villa
tearing out the old and snorting, I'm a silverback gorilla
tear it down all the way to the core
I forget I'm out of shape, in the morning I'll be sore.
I'll do it like they do behind the scenes on all those HGTV shows
go get me a truckload of Mexican "pros."
I don't even care if they are illegal
I know at the end of the day my place will look regal
They've been at it for a couple weeks now
painting, electrical, and stuff that makes me say wow!
The costs keep climbing creeping higher
Still the wife thinks she'd like a new washer and dryer.
They've made more work for me, they broke a window
I said that's fine, I'll make it a secret door to sneak in my bimbo.
My painter was suggesting he'd like to paint the outside
I told him he was off on his estimate, now my wallet has died.
The AC guy lied to us about new air ducts
they were in and out in 2 hours, not giving half of 2 fucks.
I'm not done with them, it was noted in the contract
they'll be back, to fix their shortcomings, that's a fact.
I've almost maxed out my Home Depot card, I guess I wasn't paying attention
where do I call to get a credit card extension?
☆☆☆☆☆
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