Wednesday, January 13, 2016

1/14/16 Tom Segura: Mostly Stories

    This guy is quietly hilarious.  This is his second Netflix show that I have seen, and they are both just as good.  He has a confident, natural delivery and nothing appears to be off limits.  He works the stereotypes, but never to be mean or insulting.
    He begins by making fun at small talk, which does work to get people talking, but he admits he feels like an asshole when he mentions in Seattle "sure does rain a lot."  Cab driver can't argue, just says "yep".  After a while, he goes into his "I'm going to be a dad" bit.  Jokingly, admits, I didn't do anything, just I didn't pull out.  Declares "all you pull out guys, should try it once, just stay in while you cum."  It feels fantastic.  I like how he makes it sound like he discovered busting a nut feels good.
    He then bounces out of that topic and into poking fun at losing weight.  He says "I have been fantasizing about telling people how I lost the weight that I haven't lost yet."  Then goes building around that, like every self important actor who puts out a book... "first off, it's a lifestyle choice, make smarter choices, drink more water...." after making some jokes about his weight trainer, who talks to Jesus while working out, he brings up religion for a bit, but really spends much more time complaining about parents who take their babies to the movies, if you can't afford a sitter, you shouldn't go out, just ruining the movie for everybody else.  Describes a couple scenarios which almost lead to fights at two separate movies.  I am just grateful we live in a world with Alamo Drafthouse.
    He brings up the old system when kids used to skip a grade, and how it would be great if we could skip some years as adults and land all the way in retirement.  He has a couple of examples of why he doesn't want to live a long old life, including friends of his dad.
    For awhile, he brings up people from different parts of the country, and he's surprised at how much they are just like he thought they would be.  He does take a poke at Texas, and it is funny.
    The last story involves Mike Tyson, and how he befriended him on a flight to Pittsburgh, Mike had seen him on Netflix, and then turned the tables on Tom, when Mike started calling him, that they would be showing up for his show.  I love that story, Mike Tyson has stuck around as a minor celebrity, and although his face tattoos are scary, he just seems like a guy who belongs up there, I think he has star power in him.
    I watched his last comedy show like five times, Tom is a funny guy, his observations are spot on.  I'll be watching this show a couple times over and over.

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