We discovered squirrels had made themselves at home in our home last week, so I ordered an electric zapper trap thinking it would take care of my problem lickety-split. Well, the stupid trap has been sitting there all week with peanut butter as bait as recommended in the instructions and I am still waiting for my first kill. I also went and bought a high quality pellet gun with a scope used for this very reason and I have still yet to shoot one for a kill. I don't think I have killer in me, I am a lover not a fighter. I can hit the metal target and make it go ping, but I could not hit a squirrel munching on my freshly cut lawn at 10-15 yards, and I was hiding inside aiming through an open window.
Well, Wife doesn't play games, while I was living my best imitation of Bill Murray as the grounds-keeper in Caddyshack, trying to get rid of one gopher and failing, Wife simply called Bug Master and found out they also take care of pesky squirrels. I don't think I am cheap in the way that she is, but I do feel that a "man" should be able to handle something as simple as a couple rodents without calling in the experts, but then again, I had a week and no results, so I guess Wife's idea wins.
The Bug Master guy came on Thursday and I had told Wife "I'll do it if it is like $300-$400, I really don't want to give these jackals all of my stimulus money to get rid of a freaking squirrel. Then we'll have to hire somebody to patch up the house too." Freaking things have made a hole about the size of my fist to come and go. Of course reality is always real and the guy told me very confidently that they deal with squirrels in our neighborhood all the time, he had just been to the house across the street in the last few months. Their price would be a heftier $650, but that would include 4 visits, they would set traps in the attic, after eradication, they would patch the hole, and guarantee no squirrels in the house for a year. He also said they take the squirrels and release them out on a farm, like I care if they decide to kill and cook them, I am not that type of "Austinite." I told him I would discuss with Wife and within 5 minutes of him leaving I called Wife and 10 minutes later, they had sent a contract and we sent it back signed for the "kill order" (well trap, but I prefer to think kill).
In the meanwhile, Wife is losing her mind, every time she comes home, she looks up and swears the things are judging her and giving her looks like "who is this bi-otch coming into our homes?" and "why you making so much noise and waking us so early?" Wife is bothered that the squirrels look as fat as us and apparently living the good life, they can barely make it through the hole they made. The technician came in Friday afternoon (writing this Saturday) and set two traps in the attic, saying he would be back on Monday, so hopefully, we can put this behind us soon.
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