The similarities are real, what should I do? Just as our country is being inundated with illegal immigrants all along our southern border, so too has my house been attacked from what I thought was the cutest and sweetest of the woodland animals. This past weekend as Wife arrived from working out of town, she looked up at our house along the eave and noticed some furry tails sticking out. She stared at them for a little while thinking it was curious for squirrels to just be hanging out in that part of the house. As they shuffled about, then she saw a pretty big sized hole in the wood, big enough for my fist to go through, if it wasn't up on a 2-story roof.
If my name was Biden, I would happily smear my bricks with peanut butter in hopes that the cute squirrels would keep coming, maybe put bags of peanuts up in the balcony, what could go wrong? Poor little guys, they just need a warm place to hang out and make it through the cold. I mean, I have almost 4000 square feet, who am I to kick these furry babies out, this was their land before I came and bought my way in. I should happily share all the bounty I have amassed with one and all, these squirrels hae just as much right to be here as me. This is how I would think if I was still naive... and a little bit stupid.
This is an infestation and it must be met with elimination. As soon as I noticed what they had done to my house, they stopped being cute and fuzzy and now all I want is for them to die. I was taken by their antics out in the backyard, thinking they stayed away and in the trees, where they belong. I even put food out there a time or two, not realizing what I was doing. Well, thanks to Amazon, I already have a trap set out for them, I just need them to notice it.
While looking at solutions on Youtube and Amazon, I saw many options, from traps that catch them alive, to instant kill machines, which for some reason are called humane. Once they bring destruction to me, I don't see why I have to be humane to them, this is war. When and if they chew through my electric wires and burn my house down, are they going to feel bad or guilty about it? No, they won't give a shit. I decided on an electric trap, it is supposed to shock them to heaven and be instant, it's the best I can do.
The trap came in Monday afternoon, I quickly opened it when I got home from work and put some peanut butter and laid it out in the balcony, as close physically to the hole as possible, but I think they get in and out via the tree, so maybe I need to put it out in the yard, closer to the tree. I moved it Tuesday to the porch, I hesitate to put it out in the yard in case it rains and I know some of these "soft" neighbors don't want to know I killed something cute.
We also called an exterminator for a quote, but I am not paying more than $200-$300 to remove these assholes. Bad enough, I am going to need to figure out a way to get up there and patch that hole up.
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