My folks are here for a couple days. We were supposed to spend Spring Break together and we talked about it for a couple months but we never checked the dates. Turns out, we are a week off. They watch my sister's kids and thus have to be home to babysit. But they are free this week, and so decided to come up and hang out with their favorite son (I kid).
Anyways, my dad was explaining about them getting their new shower tub installed. It looks very nice in pictures and then he was explaining other projects going on and possibly even changing out the carpets. My mom was saying she was planning on simply steam cleaning out the current carpet. I agreed with my dad that now that the dog has been gone awhile, change out the carpet, get rid of the last bit of "smell". I tease my mom about this, the house doesn't smell, the dog passed away awhile back. When he was alive, that little chihuahua owned that house. You had to be careful not to run into a room too quickly or startle the stupid thing. It actually nipped all the grandkids that walked in the presence of that dog. Of course, what do all dog owners do, take the dogs side. My mom of course felt real bad, but the half rat/half dog still was able to bite four of the six grandkids. There was always the threat of "I'm just going to put the dog outside", but of course the following time we came to visit "hold on, we'll put him in his cage".
Getting back on point, my mom was totally accepting of the dog, and its smells and bad habits. But then my dad says "how come if I smell a little of cigarette, I have to take a shower". Of course, my dad smokes and he's gotten in a bad habit of going to these little casinoes back home, I keep saying they're illegal, but everybody corrects me that the casinoes pay taxes, so hush it, Killjoy. If those casinoes are anything like the ones I saw in Louisiana, they are fulll of smokers and people with dead eyes, just putting money in those slot machines. My mom says he comes home just stinking of cigarette smell, and it's horrible. I don't know that it's worse than the smell of dog in a house.
We had a hamster for about three years, it wouldn't die, and if I waited too long to clean the cage, it was the same thing, the room the cage was in would just stink, specially if it was warm. Why do we put up with it? I wasn't a huge fan of the hamster, and towards the end, nobody really liked that chihuahua, but those stinky animals had a hold. We had to ride them out.
My parents are at a crossroad now. Invest in a new carpet, enjoy that new chemical smell, or just clean it because you have been in mourning and you are fixing to get another dog? I choose new carpet, but I know my mom, they'll end up with another animal to clean up after. I will not be buying anymore hamsters or stinky turtles, I have two boys who do a good enough job of stinking up the place.
Friday, March 6, 2015
3/6/15 Story Of My Scar?
I have a large scar on my hip. I don't ever mention it, unless people see it, and since it is on my hip, hardly anyone ever sees it. I could be a little bitch and say it was my brother's fault, but I never blamed him, it was just one of those things that happens growing up.
My brother and I used to be thrown in the shower together, I was in third grade, guess that would have made me about nine, Chubs is in fourth and he is ten. Anyway, my brother being three years younger would have been about six. It was kind of a cold night and we were fighting over the warm water. Our shower back home had glass doors, I don't know how exactly it happened, but in our wrestling for the warm water, I ended up falling through one of the glass doors, I remember falling butt first and I caught myself with my feet still in the shower, and my arms kind of caught with the toilet. I look down and there's a huge triangle of glass going into my left side at the hip.
At this point, it gets murky, but I do believe my brother started screaming for my mom, luckily my dad had just gotten home from work. I think I managed to get myself up, at least into the shower, probably in shock trying to wash off the blood, maybe I blacked out a bit, it took awhile for my folks to react, but I remember seeing the white of bone on my side and not wanting to see again. My dad somehow carried me to the car and luckily, the clinic about 4-5 blocks away had a doctor there and he proceeded to stitch me up.
We were there a good while, I remember my brother passing by the door rolling where I was being stitched, he was playing with a wheel chair out in the hallway. It took something like 37 stitches, I remember something about 30 short ones and 7 long ones or vice versa. I must have been real lucky as nothing important was cut. Maybe it helped that I was a fat kid, and it just cut fat. Either way, I didn't end up with a limp or needing blood transfusions or anything like that. I do however have the scar, it is about 7-8 inches long. It seemed bigger when I was younger.
It has to have been in April or May because I was pulled out of school and missed about a month. For the longest time, the scar would itch like crazy at times, and I was always scared to touch it and have it explode open although it never did, but it is one of those things that happened and we moved forward.
My brother and I used to be thrown in the shower together, I was in third grade, guess that would have made me about nine, Chubs is in fourth and he is ten. Anyway, my brother being three years younger would have been about six. It was kind of a cold night and we were fighting over the warm water. Our shower back home had glass doors, I don't know how exactly it happened, but in our wrestling for the warm water, I ended up falling through one of the glass doors, I remember falling butt first and I caught myself with my feet still in the shower, and my arms kind of caught with the toilet. I look down and there's a huge triangle of glass going into my left side at the hip.
At this point, it gets murky, but I do believe my brother started screaming for my mom, luckily my dad had just gotten home from work. I think I managed to get myself up, at least into the shower, probably in shock trying to wash off the blood, maybe I blacked out a bit, it took awhile for my folks to react, but I remember seeing the white of bone on my side and not wanting to see again. My dad somehow carried me to the car and luckily, the clinic about 4-5 blocks away had a doctor there and he proceeded to stitch me up.
We were there a good while, I remember my brother passing by the door rolling where I was being stitched, he was playing with a wheel chair out in the hallway. It took something like 37 stitches, I remember something about 30 short ones and 7 long ones or vice versa. I must have been real lucky as nothing important was cut. Maybe it helped that I was a fat kid, and it just cut fat. Either way, I didn't end up with a limp or needing blood transfusions or anything like that. I do however have the scar, it is about 7-8 inches long. It seemed bigger when I was younger.
It has to have been in April or May because I was pulled out of school and missed about a month. For the longest time, the scar would itch like crazy at times, and I was always scared to touch it and have it explode open although it never did, but it is one of those things that happened and we moved forward.
Thursday, March 5, 2015
3/5/15 Freezing In March?
Freezing in March is just totally wrong
my feelings on this are actually quite strong.
March means the start of spring for the masses
time to get outside get off our sorry asses.
Our yards should be turning green, lush and healthy
instead vines and weeds are making it brown and whatever beauty, just stealthy
Spring Break is in two weeks, I want to go swimming
but I feel it's too late, water will be cold, my man parts will be in-ing.
We're still going on vacation up near a beach
Chubs says that's fine as long as no teachers trying to teach.
I hope it at least gets nice enough to go to a zoo
nothing I like more than watching monkeys flinging poo.
Boy will want to go to the mall, probably the Houston Galleria
I just hope I don't get... too easy, but u get the idea.
Wife is happy as long as together we eat dinner
of course that'll happen I'm not a vacation sinner.
Last year was our first timeshare vacation, it was good,
I just hope this one is better, knock on wood.
My people are not meant to lose contact with civilization
last year we were in the woods and they were considering self-mutilation.
My mom and my boys need 24/7 internet access
if I can't do this, don't call the trip any kind of success.
my dad I thought being by some water would be good, doing some fishing
he too has changed the ding ding ding of casino machines is all he is ever wishing.
So we shall see, I am hoping for the weather to be better
if not, you have been warned, my weatherman will get a nasty letter.
It will describe what he can do with his reproductive parts,
basically, he can stick them through that hole where he farts.
if not, you have been warned, my weatherman will get a nasty letter.
It will describe what he can do with his reproductive parts,
basically, he can stick them through that hole where he farts.
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
3/4/15 Old School Fables 2?
There was once a majestic lion who roamed the earth, keeping peace with all the animals. He was revered for he was empathic and new what the other animals needed just by looking in their eyes. He would at once make it his mission to see that his followers had everything they needed and were fulfilled. Lion had but one need and that was that all trusted in him with faith and loyalty. This was easy to do when the land was green and fertile as food was plentiful.
The troubles began in the drought of 2008. All of a sudden, things that had been taken for granted were in short supply. The animals had to work together to get through the bad times. Over the years, some of the more majestic animals went off to new lands, in hopes of finding better luck and fortunes. Lion had to be strong, for it hurt him to see some of his flock abandoning his land, he was a just and fair lion and he knew that it was only fair that everyone get to experience what the world had to offer.
The mighty buffalo left and never came back. Buffalo was a friend of Lion for a few seasons, but Lion thought Buffalo was the kind of friend who would stay to the end. She did not, she met a weasel and they both slid off, not for better lands, but buffalo survived, nonetheless. Lion would see the baby buffaloes from time to time and they were never sure what happened to Buffalo, they were damaged too, as they had been abandoned and buffalo spent the rest of her days trying to conceive weas-falos, but the two could not make it work. Oh well, said Lion, the little buffaloes might be better animals than Buffalo ever was, so he helped them anytime he could.
This was also the case with Butterfly. Butterfly had been a friend of Lion since she was a teenager, and they were good friends, traveling the vast empire of Lion for thousands of miles in search of good times. Then when times went tough, Butterfly hit the road too. She too found a weasel and he promised fortunes to be had in a far away land. So She left from Lion's domain, again, leaving the oldest of her baby butterflies behind.
Butterfly Jr. was very close with Lion. Lion was always protective of Butterfly Jr., knowing her since she was a caterpillar. He hated that she was abandoned, but it was not his place to tell the other animals what to do. So Butterfly disappeared, supposedly doing well, Lion "believed" this only to keep the peace.
Lion is always Lion, things got better and although things changed some, his reign continued. Some animals came and some went, Lion accepted this, his life was prosperous because he didn't force change, he knew it was part of the great circle of life. Lion Jr. might eventually leave his domain to claim his own territory, Lion knew this was normal. Lion knew from years of being a good and just master, his own son would never abandon him. He could see that the other children now fully grown stayed in contact with him for this same reason, for he loved unconditionally. This simple point is what made Lion magnanimous, he loved without judgment, he cared because it was the right thing to do, and he gave when he knew it was appropriate.
The troubles began in the drought of 2008. All of a sudden, things that had been taken for granted were in short supply. The animals had to work together to get through the bad times. Over the years, some of the more majestic animals went off to new lands, in hopes of finding better luck and fortunes. Lion had to be strong, for it hurt him to see some of his flock abandoning his land, he was a just and fair lion and he knew that it was only fair that everyone get to experience what the world had to offer.
The mighty buffalo left and never came back. Buffalo was a friend of Lion for a few seasons, but Lion thought Buffalo was the kind of friend who would stay to the end. She did not, she met a weasel and they both slid off, not for better lands, but buffalo survived, nonetheless. Lion would see the baby buffaloes from time to time and they were never sure what happened to Buffalo, they were damaged too, as they had been abandoned and buffalo spent the rest of her days trying to conceive weas-falos, but the two could not make it work. Oh well, said Lion, the little buffaloes might be better animals than Buffalo ever was, so he helped them anytime he could.
This was also the case with Butterfly. Butterfly had been a friend of Lion since she was a teenager, and they were good friends, traveling the vast empire of Lion for thousands of miles in search of good times. Then when times went tough, Butterfly hit the road too. She too found a weasel and he promised fortunes to be had in a far away land. So She left from Lion's domain, again, leaving the oldest of her baby butterflies behind.
Butterfly Jr. was very close with Lion. Lion was always protective of Butterfly Jr., knowing her since she was a caterpillar. He hated that she was abandoned, but it was not his place to tell the other animals what to do. So Butterfly disappeared, supposedly doing well, Lion "believed" this only to keep the peace.
Lion is always Lion, things got better and although things changed some, his reign continued. Some animals came and some went, Lion accepted this, his life was prosperous because he didn't force change, he knew it was part of the great circle of life. Lion Jr. might eventually leave his domain to claim his own territory, Lion knew this was normal. Lion knew from years of being a good and just master, his own son would never abandon him. He could see that the other children now fully grown stayed in contact with him for this same reason, for he loved unconditionally. This simple point is what made Lion magnanimous, he loved without judgment, he cared because it was the right thing to do, and he gave when he knew it was appropriate.
Monday, March 2, 2015
3/3/15 Chubs Is Curious About The Birds And The Bees?
Seems like we are in times of change here. First Boy moves out, at least during the week, now Chubs has started spending large amounts of time in the bathroom and asking questioons about s-e-x. It is not surprising, considering I am a big ole perv myself, but now he has started taking his phone into bathroom, Wife says he has been spending up to an hour and a half behind closed doors. I leave for work around 550pm and she tends to send him in to shower around then, unless they are running errands.
My Dad always had the hidden Playboys laying around the house. I then felt it was the thing to do for Boy, I kept a subscription coming for years. It was really that I stopped writing checks that I have stopped as it really is a good magazine for reading, lame but the articles are really top notch. In the past year, I have bought a Playboy twice to get the flyer to start a new subscription, but I end up forgetting. Plus now with the internet, there is so much naked imagery, stills in a magazine seem quaint, almost cute.
I asked Chubs about his curiosity and it wasn't bad. He said while we were talking to a friend, he made some comments and he was left with questions. This friend is going through a divorce and his wife and him are not being friendly. They have issues and three kids between them. It is so messy and the guy just starts venting to us. The questions posed by Chubs were not about the mechanics of s-e-x (he spells it out to me), but more of love and what happens when people don't love each other. I answered his questions and as Dr. Drew on Loveline had suggested, be available but don't overwhelm kid with information he is not ready to process. I told him he will be going through changes and it will be his hormones pushing him too do things that seem crazy right now. Not to worry about it, things happen at their own rate, and ask us, we won't get mad. Don't ask Johnny in class, who is probably going to give him wrong or half right answers.
He seemed satisfied with what I said. As far as bathroom behavior, I've told Wife, don't let him take phone in bathroom, he's gonna end up with hemorroids sitting on the crapper for so long. Plus his phone is gonna get poo on it, same for all of you nasty peeps that take your phone in to do your business. Y'all saw Mythbusters, everything that goes in the bathroom ends up with trace amounts of caca!!
My Dad always had the hidden Playboys laying around the house. I then felt it was the thing to do for Boy, I kept a subscription coming for years. It was really that I stopped writing checks that I have stopped as it really is a good magazine for reading, lame but the articles are really top notch. In the past year, I have bought a Playboy twice to get the flyer to start a new subscription, but I end up forgetting. Plus now with the internet, there is so much naked imagery, stills in a magazine seem quaint, almost cute.
I asked Chubs about his curiosity and it wasn't bad. He said while we were talking to a friend, he made some comments and he was left with questions. This friend is going through a divorce and his wife and him are not being friendly. They have issues and three kids between them. It is so messy and the guy just starts venting to us. The questions posed by Chubs were not about the mechanics of s-e-x (he spells it out to me), but more of love and what happens when people don't love each other. I answered his questions and as Dr. Drew on Loveline had suggested, be available but don't overwhelm kid with information he is not ready to process. I told him he will be going through changes and it will be his hormones pushing him too do things that seem crazy right now. Not to worry about it, things happen at their own rate, and ask us, we won't get mad. Don't ask Johnny in class, who is probably going to give him wrong or half right answers.
He seemed satisfied with what I said. As far as bathroom behavior, I've told Wife, don't let him take phone in bathroom, he's gonna end up with hemorroids sitting on the crapper for so long. Plus his phone is gonna get poo on it, same for all of you nasty peeps that take your phone in to do your business. Y'all saw Mythbusters, everything that goes in the bathroom ends up with trace amounts of caca!!
3/2/15 Tax Man Cometh?
We took care of our taxes friday. It is such a pain to gather all the necessary paperwork, but our awesome government makes us jump like monkeys every year. Why aren't they happy with what they take from our paychecks? You took your cut like a big ass bully, then you come back at the end of the year to see if maybe you can take a little more? It should be set up where they take whatever amount percentage wise and then go away. People that live in houses and people that rent shouldn't be different classes of human. If you "own" your house, you get advantages, otherwise you don't. As a coworker told me awhile back, we never own our houses outright, try skipping a couple years of not paying taxes and see how fast your domicile gets put back into circulation so another happy citizen pays his fair share of taxes for the right to live in "your" home.
I guess I'm content, we got a return back of $2600. Great, I set up my paycheck to throw in an extra $100 from every check, just in case, we have a cushion. Being that I get paid 26 times a year, the amount makes perfect sense.
We also took in our son's info. We are still entwined, he is working, but we're still supporting him. Turns out the numbers worked best by keeping him as our child, so he will get a smaller return than what he was hoping for, but considering all that we give him, it is more than fair.
I also insist we get our taxes done by professionals such as H&R Block. We got audited one year and had to pay over $10000 for two years. It was a supreme pain in the ass, so now we let them do it. If there is a problem, I even pay the extra $30 so they are reponsible for the costs. Those audits shook us, everyone gives me crap about "taxes are easy, just use blah blah software". I find myself having to be polite to everyone and say yeah, but no. Next audit will be covered by H&R Block and that is the end of it.
We're lucky that place is about 5 minutes away. We got there at 830pm friday night, and were there until almost 10pm. They close at 9pm, but they said they could see us. I'm just glad it's over until next year.
I guess I'm content, we got a return back of $2600. Great, I set up my paycheck to throw in an extra $100 from every check, just in case, we have a cushion. Being that I get paid 26 times a year, the amount makes perfect sense.
We also took in our son's info. We are still entwined, he is working, but we're still supporting him. Turns out the numbers worked best by keeping him as our child, so he will get a smaller return than what he was hoping for, but considering all that we give him, it is more than fair.
I also insist we get our taxes done by professionals such as H&R Block. We got audited one year and had to pay over $10000 for two years. It was a supreme pain in the ass, so now we let them do it. If there is a problem, I even pay the extra $30 so they are reponsible for the costs. Those audits shook us, everyone gives me crap about "taxes are easy, just use blah blah software". I find myself having to be polite to everyone and say yeah, but no. Next audit will be covered by H&R Block and that is the end of it.
We're lucky that place is about 5 minutes away. We got there at 830pm friday night, and were there until almost 10pm. They close at 9pm, but they said they could see us. I'm just glad it's over until next year.
Sunday, March 1, 2015
3/1/15 How Much Education Is Enough?
A couple days ago, I saw a comment by a cousin on FB about feeling down as she is pursuing her Master's degree. Something about even if she gets the degree, it won't mean necessarily more money at the current job she is at. This is the exact same thing that happened to my wife. We decided it would be a positive thing, she went through the hard work and hassle, got a Master's in Education and the raise she got wouldn't even pay for dinner at cheap ass Cheddar's. This is not my wife's fault, she gets glowing reviews every year, her boss loves her, but the actual thing that matters, money, has not matched all those beautiful words everyone tells her about how outstanding she is at helping the community she helps.
I have a Bachelor's degree in chemistry (and hell no, I couldn't do half of what Walt on Breaking Bad does), and everyone tells me I just got lucky to end up in semiconductor field where we get paid more than anyone else. Thanks, Jerks, nice to know it's luck. How about fact that I have survived like seven layoffs, or that I am willing to work nights where few people dare go to. I digress, I too tried to get a Master's degree like ten years ago. I was not going to quit my job, so I would work, then head to San Marcos and attend classes. I found that I could not keep up that kind of pace. I told the advisor I wanted to do 1-2 classes but they pushed me into a full load, I ended up dropping out, knowing that my hard work would only get me a 5% raise. I wish I had finished it, specially because my wife has one and several family members do too, but my goal now, is making sure Boy and Chubs get at least that far and I would like to see them go farther. These are fine goals, provided you don't have kids, at my stage in life, money is king, papers on the wall are nice, but not if they don't equal more cashola.
I don't know how much education is enough, but I have also seen people posting on FB that higher education is not necessary to succeed. This is of course true, but if that is your mentality, you better show up with an eagerness to work your butt off, show the boss you have some value making you worth more than the next Joe walking in off the street, and some street smarts. Donkeys don't generally get rewarded just for showing up. My Dad always kept close pace with my Mom, salary wise, she with a Master's Degree and a counselor and my Dad with a high school degree, but the man worked hard always on a truck, I don't recall him ever taking days off, during the week cause he had a little cold.
That being said, I just hope Boy stays interested in his studies. This is why I generally succumb to his requests when he asks for computer this and electronic that. If he sees them as necessary, I see them as necessary. He knows we believe in him, and I would prefer him at home where I know his Mama is making sure he eats right. For now, we will take his word, plus he sent me pics of dinner, and it looks like he knows what he is doing.
I have a Bachelor's degree in chemistry (and hell no, I couldn't do half of what Walt on Breaking Bad does), and everyone tells me I just got lucky to end up in semiconductor field where we get paid more than anyone else. Thanks, Jerks, nice to know it's luck. How about fact that I have survived like seven layoffs, or that I am willing to work nights where few people dare go to. I digress, I too tried to get a Master's degree like ten years ago. I was not going to quit my job, so I would work, then head to San Marcos and attend classes. I found that I could not keep up that kind of pace. I told the advisor I wanted to do 1-2 classes but they pushed me into a full load, I ended up dropping out, knowing that my hard work would only get me a 5% raise. I wish I had finished it, specially because my wife has one and several family members do too, but my goal now, is making sure Boy and Chubs get at least that far and I would like to see them go farther. These are fine goals, provided you don't have kids, at my stage in life, money is king, papers on the wall are nice, but not if they don't equal more cashola.
I don't know how much education is enough, but I have also seen people posting on FB that higher education is not necessary to succeed. This is of course true, but if that is your mentality, you better show up with an eagerness to work your butt off, show the boss you have some value making you worth more than the next Joe walking in off the street, and some street smarts. Donkeys don't generally get rewarded just for showing up. My Dad always kept close pace with my Mom, salary wise, she with a Master's Degree and a counselor and my Dad with a high school degree, but the man worked hard always on a truck, I don't recall him ever taking days off, during the week cause he had a little cold.
That being said, I just hope Boy stays interested in his studies. This is why I generally succumb to his requests when he asks for computer this and electronic that. If he sees them as necessary, I see them as necessary. He knows we believe in him, and I would prefer him at home where I know his Mama is making sure he eats right. For now, we will take his word, plus he sent me pics of dinner, and it looks like he knows what he is doing.
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