I know I'm a fat ass, but still, I have been lucky enough to walk around feeling well, most of the time. I know I could be better, but as much as I may try, I don't think I'll ever walk around at a "perfect 180 pounds" as the medical books seem to think that's what healthy men should weigh. Before the whole cancer thing, I hadn't gone to a doctor in maybe five years, and that is because I feel good most of the time. Even without monitoring it, my blood pressure was a decent 133/86, starting to climb, but not in the category of needing medicine or even cutting my weight to control it, but it would help, I know.
Just this past week, with all the changes the chemo drug has been doing to my body, I can see how some people are just miserable all the time. I am not letting it get me down, I still believe as they told me, for every negative side effect, they have something to counter it, I just have to be positive and continue working. Cutting out too much sodium had me feeling like I was going to cramp up every time I moved outside of my comfort zone, from stretching my legs, to stretching around to wipe my butt. One muscle group or another does not work well when it is not supplied the nutrients it needs. I drove as passenger with Wife last night to go pick up Mijo in Georgetown and the whole way I was in discomfort, my back was tight, I couldn't really reach around for fear of an arm cramp, and even after we picked him up, we tried eating at a restaurant up there and getting off, I just felt like I had a backpack on with 500 pounds in it. I was not feeling up for anything. Luckily, the wait was going to be an hour, so we left. We decided on our old trusty Whataburger and I said F it, I am eating a big boy burger, let the sodium consume me, I just felt bad. It was great, but even getting home, I lay in bed and felt my lower back flinching as I lay in bed, facing up, our bed has lifting abilities, so I lifted the feet up to give my back a little natural curve, and still I fell asleep kind of tense.
Now that it is morning (writing this Saturday morning), I feel like a cloud has lifted. I haven't felt any cramping or tightness and the world just feels better. I can say the same thing about all the rash I was feeling a few days ago. My mom just suggested a big dollop of Vaseline and sure enough, by morning my boys downstairs feel almost good as new. The little ulcer next to my leg scar is also looking like it's drying up, I have been applying hydrocortisone to keep it moist.
It is sad to figure that some people do live with these "side effects" without being on chemo, because of genetics or bad diets, and I can see that it must suck to be in some people's shoes. I used to kind of sneer when people say they have fibromyalgia, this from listening to too many episodes of Loveline, and Dr. Drew never seemed to believe the callers when it came to that one. I'm not saying I have that, but the symptoms are similar. If these people would maybe adjust their diets, maybe they could find some relief. Life is so much better when your body is quiet and not constantly calling for attention.
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