7/28/17 What Is The Real Reality?

    I live with a perpetual thought of soon, such as soon, we will be able to afford a new boat, or a new car, for myself.  The reality is that although together we have been slowly earning more and more every year, we seem to just barely not be able to afford anything but the basics.  Add to that my first setback, which was a pretty hefty paycut and now I am left wondering whether we were chasing hollow dreams that are next to impossible for the common man.
    I have wanted a new boat ever since we stopped using ours a few years ago due to us outgrowing it.  Our Bayliner was fine when Boy and his friends were all little kids.  We could fit the boat with 8-10 bodies, provided 5-6 of the bodies were under 60 pounds.  Once they all got into high school, it became next to impossible to include everyone we had once.  My dad and I would occasionally fish, but then he has become less and less mobile, so he couldn't really get on the boat, risking hurting himself if he lost his grip and fell over or something.  Owning this small boat just became more of a hassle than a fun thing.
    I went and subscribed to a Boating magazine subscription so I could familiarize myself with what is out on the market.  WOW!  I didn't realize boating was only for millionaires and lottery winners.  There was a beautiful wakeboarding boat on the cover, it is only good for riding around pulling people.  It was not designed for overnighting in it.  There are no staterooms underneath, or anything other than cushioned seating and a large motor to make it move efficiently.  Anyways, this boat was $161,500.  There was a comparison test with other similar boats of this type, as these magazines usually do, and the other boats were all in the $75,000-$186,000 range.  This is crazy for a daytime only use toy.
    I could say the same thing when I am looking at Car and Driver and all the really nice cars are also over $100,000.  I would love to drive a Porsche Panamera, which is their first effort at a four door sedan, but they quickly get over that amount.  Forget a Lamborgini, which tend to stay above $200,000.  Even the more normal cars like Audis and BMWs and Mercedes, when you look at their flagship vehicle, it will be somewhere in the $80-$100k., which is still crazy expensive.
    If I wanted to maybe some day re-do our backyard and install a new pool with a grotto cave and slide, and water features, we would be looking at probably $50-$75k.  What are we left with, which is the annoying thing?  I already knew we couldn't afford planes, but if boats also fall in there and fancy cars, are we supposed to really just watch television on the weekends.  We could maybe afford season tickets to SeaWorld or Fiesta Texas, maybe even Schlitterbahn, with their stupid season tickets going for $120 a head, but then we have to deal with all sorts of crowds and overpriced food.
    Is there a whole population that just gets to point at a boat and says "that one", I don't care about the price?  Are these magazines like Playboy, showing beautiful sexy bodies the common man can't ever have?  I am quite frustrated this summer, not only can I not really venture out to get wet, I have no means of getting in the water if I wanted to.

7/27/17 Lil Dicky, Rapper For The Rest Of Us?

    I was just introduced to this rapper last week by Boy and his friend that stays with us.  Both of them came with their phones and a different video loaded up.  I have grown to like rap and stuff a little better over time.  It helps to understand why and where it comes from.  Boy gave me his backstory, which he tells on "Professional Rapper" which he sings with Snoop Dogg.  He claims that his angle is to take humor and incorporate it into the music and in the video goes on to explain "like I can tell a story about this morning watching Boy Meets World and jerking off to Topanga Lawrence, like the 14yr old Topanga."  Just when you think he has topped himself, he gets even more gross in the next video and on and on.
    Pillow Talk is a crazy almost eleven minute story about a conversation after having sex with a ditzy chick.  The funny part is he doesn't even involve his brain in the whole act until she asks "where is your brain?"  then a cartoon brain shows up and starts adding to the conversation.  The funniest line after they are discussing god and the creation of earth, he asks about her opinion on Pangea, and bored she comes back with "let's change the subject", Brain standing between them utters while pointing at her "This bitch don't know bout Pangea." in a deadpan voice.  They go on to a couple other big conversations about being vegetarian and taking an Uber, felt like a real conversation.
    "Classic Male Pre-Game" is pretty funny showing a standard Friday night in an apartment full of guys, waiting for something to happen, starting to drink a little to feel relaxed, then it turns into too much and the night is lost, waiting for phone calls that never come.  The funny is how he manages to make it so real, anyone in that situation can relate to what he says.
    "White Dude" is his celebration of being happy to be born a white dude, life is so much easier "I ain't got to worry where the cops at" is pretty funny in a dark way. "...happy that my name ain't stupid, Dave could've been Daquan with a few kids", he goes on and on, taking digs at the females too.  "I go on dates, never have to worry bout getting raped..." and even funnier "if he gets pregnant (couple) he can pack a bag and be on his way, but Good Luck, Girl!"  His lyrics are too funny.
    "Ex Boyfriend" is another story about dating a beautiful girl he is dating.  Just as the night approaches when they are going to do it for the first time, they run into an ex-boyfriend of hers.  He assumes this is the one guy she has had sex with and self destructs comparing himself to him.  I won't ruin the rest, but I almost fell off my chair at work listening to him going on.

7/26/17 Maybe We Do Have The First Female President?

    I know the Donald talks and boasts like a man to the public, but he sure seems like a chick when it comes to doing man's work.  He hired Jeff Sessions, I would never say he was a good guy himself, but he has been around a long time and if you lean conservative I am sure he is one of your top guys, just on seniority.  It wasn't but about five months ago that Jeff and Trump were high fiving and patting each other on the back as Trump celebrated winning something he really shouldn't have.  He praised Sessions on how great he was, almost taking him as his vice president before deciding on an even more conservative Pence.
    Anyway, Trump brags that he makes great decisions, everything he touches turns to gold, everything is always top notch if it somehow involves him, so choosing Sessions as his Attorney General should be something solid that lasts at least as long as his presidency, yet Sessions had a little white lie he tried to pass through.  He stated, under oath, that he never had anything to do with Russia, then a couple months later, news reports leaked that he met twice with a Sergey Kislyak, who apparently hangs around to see who foolishly falls for his trap.  Why is this guy in the country, kick his commie ass back where he belongs?
    So now the problem for Trump, does he support his guy?  I mean he was telling us how great he is less than half a year ago, now because Sessions has recused himself and will have no input into the Russia investigation, which is the least he can do, he can't help control the investigation and Trump is probably scared of what Mueller might find.  Trump does not support his guy, he attempts to throw him under the bus.  Even worse, he does it on Twitter, that is chick territory.  If he has a problem with someone, how about acting presidential and pulling him aside, maybe even asking him to step down.  Nope, Trump's way is like that of a spoiled privileged child.  He will get his way by throwing as big a tantrum as he needs to.
    I still don't see that he has done any good for the regular person, but that is neither here nor there.  Even big time conservative Ann Coulter has come to Session's side on this saying "Be a Man!" to Trump.  If you want him fired, fire him, if not, shut up.  He is going to go through a ton of people before he is done.  Somebody needs to take his phone from him, can you imagine Abraham Lincoln or George Washington distracted by gadgets like this guy?

7/25/17 Out Of The 400's?

    I am not 100% sure yet that the testosterone shot is making a difference, but I managed to lose 11 pounds my first week on it.  There is also the thyroid medication I started taking and I had read that a lack of both could be leading to my lethargy.  I decided to stop making excuses since I got the shot Monday last week, I proceeded to walk two miles that night and every night after at work.  I even managed to jump on our treadmill at home Friday and Sunday and walk another 2 miles each time.  I will not lie, it sucked starting over, even walking was making my thighs burn.  I felt like I was walking up a hill even though I was just going around our building a half mile at a time (I work in a large building, three laps around the circular hallway makes a half mile).
    I say out of the 400's because that is where I was.  I got as high as 413 before my skin graft surgery.  On my house scale, that transferred to 408.  There didn't seem to be much I could do while my leg was healing.  I also had a discussion with the physician assistant that is monitoring me at Victory Medical and she said that without the testosterone I wasn't going to see much in the way of improvements.  I could kind of see this, I always start lifting weights and seem to plateau at 300 pounds.  With the long rest, I am having to start back at square one benching 135 pounds.  This sucks and believe me, it was heavy the first day I went in there, but I am already feeling better and the soreness is already mostly gone.  Even in my legs, where I felt like I was walking uphill, my thighs are starting to feel better.
    So the scale said 397 yesterday morning, and I headed directly over to the clinic for my second shot on my butt.  I am supposed to learn to do it myself, but poking myself gives me the heebie jeebies.  By the way, I am also eating better.  The P.A. got after me for telling her we eat lunch almost every day at Southpark Meadows at a fast food place.  I haven't had fast food in a week, and I am trying to eat mostly fish.  I didn't want to go crazy with the diet, but Wife decided I was kind of doing Atkins, with salads, which I think is South Beach diet.  The P.A. wanted me to consider ordering food to the house from like Blue Apron, or those delivery home services that bring healthy foods, but I don't have time to sit and cook stuff like that.  I'd rather boil some eggs, or eat a bowl of cereal.
    Ultimately, I would like to get back to the 250-280 range, if I can get there.  I had been stuck around 350 for the last couple years, but as they told me.  I was carrying mostly estrogen and along with making me a lil bitch, it also promotes storage of fat, so I am curious how far testosterone will take me.

7/24/17 Leg Finally Healed Completely?

    Although the doctor said we were done on the 11th this month, I still had a small hole to tend to in my gash area.  Last night it finally closed up to the point that I took the bandage off to shower and it came off with no visible signs of blood or ooze.  It was the first time I left the house with my leg unwrapped since probably last September.  It feels so freeing not to have that wrapping on.  Every time I have gone to the bathroom I have dreaded taking off the bandages to the point I kept a kitchen trash bag nearby so I could cover and tape my leg for a quick shower when and if I pooped.
    I am glad the whole process from start to finish was virtually painless, other than when the injury happened, that felt like someone hit me with a baseball bat, but ever since, even with a 1-inch deep gash and maybe 4-5 inches long, it never "hurt".  The nurses told me I must have damaged the nerves in the area to the point that there are none there to tell me it should hurt.  The gash was surrounded by a bruise two or three times larger than the cut, so it is probably true.  The doctors told me the purple in the area would get better, but it may also stay that way.  It is a leg, not really up at eye level, so it doesn't bother me if it stays a little ugly.
    What I do want to see come back to normal is the thickness of my leg around the area.  It has been wrapped in bandages since around April.  I used to get wrapped in the Unna Boot for the first few months and that went from above the toes to right below the knee.  Once they decided to do the skin graft, the plastic surgeon was only worried about covering the wound area and he wanted me showering and washing it once a day.  It was gross, in that I did go about five months without washing my right leg.  At one point, Wife said "No!  Your foot is way too gross", I didn't want to get anything wet, but she took a wet rag and scraped my toes and all the skin she could reach to clean them up.  But back to the point, since I was only wrapping around the 6-7 inches around where the injury is, I developed a weird look, where my calf looks twice as big as the bottom of my leg.  Wife said it looked like a chicken drumstick, all bony at the bottom.  I am hoping that a couple of days with my leg free will allow it to come back to normal.
    Have I learned anything from this?  Yes, if I had jumped on it sooner, I might have avoided it opening up and becoming all the work it became, according to Wife.  It did start out as two skinny lines on the surface.  My mother in law said God works in mysterious ways, so maybe I had to suffer through all this, to find out that I had low testosterone and a bad thyroid, which I might not have discovered if I hadn't been forced to go to the doctor, so there is that.  I also learned that Boy is a decent driver, after the surgery I had to give him control over driving me around as I couldn't move my ankle enough to drive myself.  It was good to see he is a fair to decent driver.  Oh, and I learned that I will not be running a lawn mower ever again.  I have two boys in the house, and when they leave, hopefully in another fifteen-twenty years I will be hiring a professional service.  Boy is best suited to cutting the grass as he is always wearing pants and boots, like the lawn mower instructions suggest.  I was playing it wild by doing it in shorts and Crocs for way too long.

7/23/17 Emulating Role Models To Manhood?

    I had a weird conversation with my younger brother concerning many things earlier tonight (Saturday).  I texted him happy birthday because it was late and frankly he is usually a man of few words.  I was very surprised he called back within minutes to vent and talk for a bit. I won't go into details but he mentioned it sucked not having role models growing up.
    Maybe we didn't have the traditional role models, but I think I found what I needed to grow and even thrive.  I talked a little bit with the wife and she said one of my role models was one of the band directors.  I was obsessed in high school with being the best and he coached me on my way to going to State.  He would suggest exercises for my fingers like playing scales and then doing the same thing in reverse, playing the same scales but only sounding every other note.  I took everything suggested as the key to make me better and I believed.  Eventually, I reached my goal and I felt pretty good for it.  The funny thing about it is he was the same band director but my brother was tormented by him, Wife says the same thing happened to her.  He expected my brother to be as driven as me, but he did not have the same interests.  Wife said she also felt extra pressure from him because it had worked so well for me.  Wife said she was interested enough to be in band, but she never cared for the competitive aspect of it.  It is a little weird but the same guy who mentored me to greatness, also scared my brother enough that he preferred quitting the band.
    Another role model that I just gravitated towards immediately was my roommate in college.  He was definitely the opposite of me, while I was an introvert and had a hard time talking to people, he was a definite extrovert and loved being the center of attention.  I may have not gone completely all the way to "life of the party", he did change me enough to be comfortable in my own skin while talking to the fairer sex.  My brother would have benefitted with someone like my roommate, but not everyone is interested in becoming more open.  Coincidentally, I don't know I could still hang with my roommate now, once we got out of college, I had mastered what he had to teach me, him still trying to be center of attention kind of grew old, at a certain point.
    I think first you have to choose who and what you want to be as a grown up.  I probably had other people I looked up to and learned a thing or two from, even from our dad who was not around much, as a truck driver and then he had his group of friends who he liked partying with.  I didn't think this was a good thing, so maybe as an anti-role model, I have never cared to have friends that take me away from my kids.  I've had a couple of guy friends over the years, but I don't really let them take my time from me being available for the boys.  After all, I hope my boys see me as their role model and someone to grow up and be like.  I can't say why my brother is so different than I or my other brother, but he finally has a plan and a good job lined up.  I hope things go well here in a couple of weeks when school starts up again, he will be a brand new teacher and although it is a huge responsibility, he might just have the right mix of intelligence, presence, and insight to become a role model for a few of these young kids coming in the new generation.

7/22/17 Top Golf And A Slice Of Cake?

    We just came back a couple hours ago from Top Golf in North Austin.  It is a very cool hip place to be at.  It is unusual in that it is fun for the whole family, college students, work outings,  and there was everything from families to groups of friends hanging out.  It is as busy as a beehive inside.  Driving up to it is a little exciting when you notice all the lights on the cages and the immense size of the place. 
    You walk into the middle floor and right away we were encountered with a concierge/host.  Since we were attending a party they asked us is we knew where our party was.  We said no and they looked it up and walked us over to the group.  The back of the building is long and there are at least three floors.  It is designed with about 100 "bays" per floor.  A group of up to 6 players can play while a couple more people than the six playing can sit around having fun and food and drinks.  From the name you can gather that the sport is golf, and it is, kind of.  The bays face out to a field about the size of a football field and there are huge circles about the size of a VW bug all over the place.  The idea is to get the ball into these circles.  From this, supposedly a few different games can be played.
    We went out there for Girlie's birthday, and all I can say is I am glad we were not hosting.  It can be a little pricey.  Each bay rents for different prices during the day, $25 morning until noon, $35 noon to 5:00pm, and $45 5:00pm to close.  The party was at 8:00pm and they had two bays for at least two hours.  That is $180, not including food and drinks.  We showed up about 8:30pm, then Chubs and I went upstairs to buy membership cards, at $5 a person, but these cards can be used every time you go back.  At this point, Wife said they were trying to get out of there in less than 30 min, but nobody was actually moving.  I wasn't sure what to do, but I did want to hit a ball or two.
    I said hi and hugged everyone, it is weird that we have known these people more than 20 years.  We haven't stayed close to many other people, but these people persist to keep us hanging in there.  I have pics of some of the girls as babies who now have babies of their own.  One of the boys was in diapers when we met, now he is literally bigger than me.  Girlie was having a blast, with her family there, and all her close girlfriends that I know were there.  She got a cute cake decorated with a Starbucks cup, and all sorts of make-up, like lipsticks and eye shadow boxes, it matched her high maintenance personality.
    Chubs managed to hit a few more golf balls than me and he seemed to have a good time, even though he didn't want to be bothered before we left the house.  He even ended up bringing Girlie's little brother to our house, they are the same age, both are New Orleans voodoo babies, born two weeks apart after we all went to New Orleans.
    It seemed a fun and even good place to be competitive, but there were too many people to really play.  I'd like to go back, maybe with my brother and his wife or my sister, her hubby would love this, I think.  Y'all look it up, www.topgolf.com.