7/10/19 When Do We Stop Treating Boy Like A Kid?

    Boy, our oldest is 25 and I believe one year or 5 classes away from graduating.  He claims he was going to graduate in the fall, but one of his classes did not form, so he has to wait until the spring.  He has this semester loaded with the 4 classes and then next semester will just be the one class.  I was most looking forward to getting his car payment off our books and giving it to him to worry about.  Even though he is in school, he has this internship that has pretty much turned into his first real job.  He is making like $23/hr, so my question is "when can we expect he can take care of himself?"  We would never turn our back on him, but recently, for example, we have been spending a good amount of money on clothes for Javalina, buying him slacks and shoes and plenty of jeans.  This makes me feel a little bit bad about the feeling like we are ignoring our other son now that he is older.
    I couldn't help myself, we were at Buckle which is his go to store and I saw a couple of shirts he tends to wear.  I threw them into our basket since we were getting Javalina a bunch of stuff already.  I felt better knowing Boy has some new clothing, but then a thought occurred to me.  He could be rude and say "naw, I don't like that shit."  When the thought ran through my head, it was followed by the obvious "how many kids your age do you think parents are still helping out?"  I know Girlie hasn't had any help from her folks since she graduated high school, same with his best friend, his GF, DD, DDs GF.  They all talk about their folks like "yeah, we see them once in a while."
    Do we just have a better relationship with Boy, or is it simply because we offer free room and some meals?  I say some meals because he spends a lot of time with his GF and they usually eat out by themselves.  Boy joins us for maybe 1 or 2 meals a week, factoring in that Wife is out of town during the week and I work nights.
    Since he is going to have a full class load this fall, we already discussed that he can keep paying me only for the Shell card and what he owes until the end of the year on one of our credit cards he overused on Amazon.  I am really hoping he is mostly working in the spring and just cutting out for the one class so that he could really take over the payment permanently.  Once he graduates, I want to add the utilities to what he pays for around the house.  Either that or a flat fee equivalent to about $400 or so.  I love having the Boy around and I don't want to punish him, but there is a possibility he is making more money than me, why shouldn't he be helpful?