9/7/18 Premature (Netflix)

    I have been watching a lot of movies lately on Netflix due to how my job works.  I spend half the night getting samples prepared and then the other half stuck on a chair in front of a tool running samples.  There is nothing else to do once I sit, so I go through a movie or two unless I am really into something on YouTube.
    Premature was another teen movie of kids finishing high school and getting ready to move on to college.  This one was cool because it was like a mix of Groundhog Day and American Pie.  The main kid has an interview to Georgetown University which he hasn't realized he is only doing it for his parents.  Before he knows it, he is pulled out of his routine and hanging out with his best girl friend.  The resident hottie has been getting tutored by him and she suggests he come over to her house for an impromptu study session.  When he gets there, she admits she has had a crush on him for a long time and starts undressing.  She gets up real close to him and starts going for his crotch.  As soon as she starts massaging him in all the right places, spurt.  His orgasm is the reset button as he figures out after a couple of scenarios.
    After awhile, he stops caring about getting dressed for the interview and just wants to figure out how to stop the madness.  At a certain point, he starts figuring out who he is and what he needs to do instead of being a machine that just pleases his parents.  Alan Tudyk plays the recruiter from Georgetown and as always, does a hilarious job on a nothing role.  He plays it up and makes himself part of the funny.
    The shenanigans are in full swing as we see him go from smoking a little weed, to picking a fight with the boys volleyball team, to beating up (or trying to) his 4th grade bully, and going as far as feeling up the boobs on a teacher who just seems to have too much going on under her blouse.  He manages to save himself by getting to an orgasm and resetting his day each time, as embarrassing as that moment is.
    He starts going crazy because he is stuck in a loop, he decides he is cursed and takes it out on the goofy neighbor of his best friend who is a girl.  They go to his house and the grandma is from the old country, or something, she has a creepy vibe and basically attacks the kid.  I was unclear if she attacked him to give him the curse or attacked him because of the curse.
    In the end, all he needed was to figure out who he really wanted to be with and not screw around too much.  Georgetown would be a great school, but maybe not for him.

9/6/18 Why Must Bi-otches Fester Over Everything?

    Over the last couple of months I have been following kayaker on You Tube.  He is great, most of his videos have been focused on catching fish in bays and even out a couple miles into the Gulf in his kayak.  He lives in Pensacola and through his videos makes me wish I lived there.  From the kayak fishing to the beach where they regularly fish and just all around hang out.  He has a girlfriend who he has never made the focus of his videos but obviously he hangs out with her most of the time, so she is in the bulk of the videos.  She is cute without being a showoff, she plays the sidekick very well.  If she is in the video, she smiles and makes a comment about  where they are at, usually good stuff.  I would say 98% of the comments from viewers are positive, so great.
    After watching a video today, I was looking through the videos for additional information of where they were at or something and I came across an obviously confused woman who has too much time on her hands.  Bitch, go clean the house with your negative energy.  Or my new favorite, "eat some make-up, see if you can get prettier on the inside!!"  Anyway, she was going on about how the guy is "using" the girl to increase his views and that maybe someday she will come to her senses and realize she is being used.  That the guy is too selfish to get married and won't, so she is wasting her time.  This was totally out of line with all the other comments, which stay on track about the fishing or whatever they are doing.
    Why do 2 people have to be married on paper?  It is just to protect the woman, maybe give her an edge when she decides to take his stuff.  Can't people just be happy that people get along peacefully and lovingly without going in with your surgical knife to dissect what is wrong with them?  He is called selfish, and I say so?  I am a selfish a-hole, hardly ever "worship" my wife, but in my need to do this and that and the other, I only want to do those things with her by my side.  If I go boating, I want her there, if I go to Disney, it is because we are going together.  She has made life more interesting and fun, but we are all individuals.  I am not responsible for making her life "shine."  Wife has a mouth and tells me when she doesn't like something, she is an intelligent individual, I assume the girlfriend is in the same boat.  She appears to be happy spending lazy days fishing on the beach, that can't be enough for more of y'all?
    Y'all women that think you should be worshipped must have been dropped on your ponytails when you were young or you've smelled too much hairspray, there's holes in your brains.  I've never met a wife that was worshipped that appreciated the acts done by the man, so no, that is not a good idea, ever.  And no, my wife is no pushover, she is actually a huge "ballbuster", but we  have a very good balance here, going on 30 plus years together.

Good Kids (Netflix)

    Good Kids is another fun little movie I found on Netflix last night.  It focuses around four friends who have just about finished their high school time and are days from going off and starting their college lives.  Instead of getting drunk and being stupid, they have been the good kids, never gotten in trouble, all four heading to great schools, but yet, they feel incomplete.  They decide they need to get the monkey off their back that no one has really invited them to any of the parties that kids have.
    One of the kids, works as a tennis instructor at the area country club.  Now that he is 18, some of the women decide he is good enough to take care of more than their backstroke.  He needs money to get his Indian girlfriend over here, while his friends are positive that he/she is catfishing the friend.  Their luck changes when Lion, the friend into Karate gets invited to a private party on an exclusive island.  They realize they too can have a good time partying.  They end up going to more and more parties almost going to far, but they get it back together.
    The tennis instructor gets found out by one of the husbands and he tells the other ones, so it looks bad for the one guy, but of course, this is a kid's movie.  I don't want to give the end away, but I thought the movie was cute and that there is a lesson to be learned.
    It is not all tests and volunteering, party a little, it will help you assimilate with strangers.  Apparently, everyone likes to party a bit, drink a beer, play beer games, and act the fool once in a while.  Without these skills, you will have a harder time fitting in.  I liked when the tennis guy had a 1 on  1 with the party guy.  The party guy said basically we never didn't invite you, y'all just exiled yourselves.  The parties were always open to anyone who wanted to come.  I don't know if that is true for any party, but I always felt this way.  If someone did not expressly invite me, then why would I show up and possibly disappoint some people who didn't want to see me.  Anyways, I enjoyed the movie.

9/4/18 Labor Day Weekend?

    I have to say, I am pretty proud of myself for keeping up with Wife's car.  In the last two weekends, I have installed new tires, she got the first set up to a little over 70,000 miles, which now that I think of it, sounds like a lot.  Still, when I went to Discount Tire, only one of the front tires was in the dangerously thin section of wear, according to their charts.  I figure, if these new tires can give her about the same, then that should get us to four years.  I don't know if she'll keep the car with that many miles, but currently she does love what we have affectionately been calling the butt plug.  There is just something to its look, where it is simultaneously cute but boxy, too small, but big enough for the job.

    After doing the tires, she mentioned it seemed low on power.  I thought maybe it could be the gas filter, it has given us problems on the Excursion.  When I asked the guy at Advance Auto Parts, he said if they didn't carry it, it would be inside the gas tank and not meant to be cleaned regularly.  He did suggest the spark plugs should be changed as often as every two months, shoot, we hadn't changed them since we bought the car, two years ago.  He was able to look up the right part number based on the engine size.

    I brought them home and then started doubting myself that I could do it.  I looked at a couple of YouTube videos showing how to do it and it actually seemed very easy.  Sure enough, it all went smoothly until the last plug, on the far right.  It seems trapped by another part that has two hoses going to it.  I figured how to take the wires off the coil, but that didn't help too much.  I found another person online asking for the same question and the guy who did the video responded that it will come off just by forcing it out, and it did without breaking it.

    After the spark plugs, I filled her washer fluid reservoir with new fluid solution and even added a gas cleaner to the fuel container, in case she has some water in it.  I feel pretty good about doing all this, but I still had a gameplan to finish my backyard patio.  Maybe this week I will get my chance.  It is a short week, work wise and my folks are coming this weekend.

9/3/18 Rest Of The Weekend?

    Once I accepted the fate of our team, the weekend was much better.  We went to the mall after deciding we were running low on sheets for our beds.  Maybe my feet need a pedicure, but I have cut through about three fitted sheets with my feet, I guess the dry skin is out of control because of the Crocs.  Anyways, I told Wife we might as well go buy some a couple sets, we do have four king size beds in our house and I do change the sheets anytime someone sleeps over.  By having extra sets, I just have to remove whatever is on the bed and instantly put on a new set.  The dirty one then falls in with the dirty clothes but there is no rush to wash them.  We got lucky in that JCPenney had a 50% off sale.  We bought two sets for the King beds and one for the Queen bed in Boy's room.  For some reason, he seems to prefer the crack addict lifestyle and usually sleeps like he doesn't own sheets for his bed.  It really bothers me that he lives like an animal.  He has enough computing power in his room to run an airport or a small army, but he can't keep his nice clothes on hangers, he can't keep sheets on his bed.  At some point, he thought pallets would make a nice platform for his spare twin bed which is more of a sofa, but we finally said no.  They didn't match, he didn't paint them.  I don't know if at 24, I should still be going in and de-cluttering for him, but his room seems to overwhelm him, I think.
    Anyways, Dillard's was having a great sale of an additional 40% off stuff already on sale.  I managed to get another 2 polo style shirts that are normally $70, two T-shirts, and even a pair of shorts that normally sells for $60, all for $63.  I thought it was such a great deal, I didn't even charge it.  That was about all we could muster, so we left.
    The plan was to go to Pappadeaux, we haven't had a nice meal in a long time.  Out of nowhere, Javalina suggested maybe trying the Abuelo's restaurant next to the mall.  We have been going to the mall since I moved up here in 1991, and I had never eaten there.  It just looked like the kind of place that overcharges and gives you mediocre food, plus it is loud and crowded because it serves people from the mall.  We figured it was close, both Pappadeaux locations are on the other side of town.  The restaurant was actually pretty on the inside, the waitress was quick with the chips and drinks, the prices were a little on the pricey side, but not crazy.  It turned to shit when the family of Mexican idiots walked in and sat on the table next to us.  The two guys were laughing like they were on their horses out on the back 40, fucking loud fucks.  Use your inside voice when the restaurant is half empty.  Take cues from the others.  There were three or four other families around us and it felt like we were eating alone, then these "compadres" come in and they might as well had megaphones, fucking goons.  The fajitas were also a little sparse.  I could swear the fajitas for two got mixed with a serving for one, but we made the most of it.  Javalina's plate with pork loins wrapped in bacon looked like a quality plate.  Mexican restaurants should also know about tortillas and they should have a little crispiness as they are burned on the "comal".  This place seemed to microwave their tortillas.  We might try this place again, but the fools sitting next to us have to go sit outside, I hate loud asses indoors.

9/2/18 It's Gonna Be Another Long Year?

    Wife wanted to go here and there yesterday, on Saturday.  I was more like 'yeah, after the Longhorns game we'll do whatever you want." The Longhorns were supposed to play from 11:00am until around 2:30pm.  I got up at 7:00am, did the husband/wife thing for a few minutes, then got up to come downstairs.  Javalina was already up and I offered him donuts, to come with me to get some at the corner donut place.  I had meant to change the spark plugs on Wife's car, so I thought I should get them to do that, as well.  I went upstairs to get my shorts and wallet and told Wife our plans.  She had planned on sleeping until the Longhorns game was over.  This gave her a new mindset, now she wanted to go have breakfast with her boys.  We got dressed and went to Bill Miller which was way more packed than normal.  We go in there about once a week, and usually we are there alone or with maybe another table or two having someone.  Today, there must have been a full house, most of the tables had people on them.  We managed to find a table, and ate a big breakfast before 11:00am.  I had a plate with brisket, eggs, beans, hash browns, and pancakes.  Wife had a couple tacos and some pancakes, Javalina had a couple tacos.
    We got back home just in time for the kickoff at 11:00am.  Right away, it felt like the Horns were not in control.  I know it sounds elitist, but the Longhorns are supposed to be a superior program.  We are smack in the center of Texas and that should allow us to choose the best football players in all of Texas, as Austin is about a 3-4 hour drive from most anywhere in Texas.  Add to that, the school made $215 million, tops in the Big 12.  Maryland, meanwhile is 2nd to last in the Big 10 and barely made $94.9million.  They are also up near Baltimore and New York, not exactly known as a region that produces football players, shoot, most rosters from any state have a few Texas kids on them.  Oklahoma sometimes manages to steal a third of their teams rosters from Texas.  How about OSU in 2016 with 70 of their allotted ~105 kids from Texas?  Just saying, Texas is loaded with talent, more so than most other states, except maybe California.
    As soon as I noticed Maryland taking over, my full belly took over and I napped, seeing only about half the 1st quarter.  Wife called me to come lay in bed, she knew I had fallen asleep sitting on the sofa.  I slept through what would have been the whole game, but the football gods put a rain delay in the game of almost 2 hours.  I woke up at 4:00pm or so and the game was just starting the 4th quarter.  Maryland ran down the field, scored a field goal to go up by 5.  Perfect, if Texas could rally and make a long slow drive in about 6 minutes, they would win with a TD.  Nope, QB1 threw an interception.  The defense was stout, stopped Maryland right away, Horns got the ball back, now they had 4 minutes, if they could muster a TD, they could still win.  Nope, the running back fumbled the ball.  The defense stopped them again, they punted and the return guy even brought the ball back to almost midfield.  Come on guys, two minute hurry up offense!  Score 1 TD and you win.  Nope, QB1 threw another interception.  I'm sorry, but at some point try another quarterback, what do you have to loose?  If you don't give them playing time, they might leave to another team and then there you will be.  A freaking +$200 million program with no real reason to be worth that much.  I don't know why they still make that kind of money, it has been almost ten years since the McCoy era.
    Go get in your bubble and tell us the excuses why a dinky program from the north has beat your sorry asses two years in a row?  This is supposed to be a practice squad to work out the kinks, not a yearly swift kick in the ass to remind you, your shit does indeed stink.

9/1/18 Javalina Volunteered To Be The Tip Of The Spear?

    I love the fight in Javalina.  Last year, he was playing tackle which is either lineman on the end, not including the tight-ends, but a few guys have left, so he volunteered to be center, which is the guy in the middle that starts each play by handing the ball to the quarterback.  I fear the center position, there is no upside and the only thing you can do is either play it perfectly or screw up.  Playing it perfectly means you can get the ball to the quarterback in every down either from "under center" where the Quarterback is directly behind the center and for lack of better language, has his hands right up in the center's ass.  The shotgun position, which is played 5-7 yards behind the line of scrimmage was originally used for quarterbacks who had lost a step and needed a little more spacing to be effective.  This formation has actually become more normal and now it is used a lot in college and is favored by quarterbacks who are very fast to see the field and decide whether to keep it or hand it off to a running back.
    But back to Javalina, he must become adept at both styles, since they are generally used interchangeably throughout a game.  If he does well, it will just be "well, that is what a center is supposed to do."  But if he screws up multiple times, there is no one else to blame, maybe the quarterback for having butter fingers.  We will work on it at home a bit, at least it'll be something we can do together for awhile.  He brought a football home, so we will be practicing on it sometime this weekend.  The only thing of course, I just talked to him, is that he has a bruised shoulder and I'm thinking it might be a good idea to let the shoulder rest a few days.  He showed me the hiking procedure and stupidly hiked the ball, just letting it bounce off the walls in the next room, luckily he didn't break anything.  I go "hey, don't actually release the ball, Fool of a Took."  He said "I didn't know I was."  I chuckled as I can tell the boy is drained, they are practicing five days a week, and even today, being Friday, they were out there until 5:30pm.
    I guess if this goes well, it would be a good skill to be good at.  It seems that at the higher levels, the linemen are always getting shifted around from position to position when someone gets hurt.  I just read that because the center "has an ideal view of the defense, he typically makes the first line call."  Because the center must know so much, they are typically the most intelligent of the offensive linemen.  Knowing this, I kind of think maybe Javalina should be the center.  This boy though, like he doesn't have a big ego already.  He likes to say he is the strongest player on the field against his teammates, now if he starts thinking he is the smartest, his helmet may not fit him by the end of the season.  Rumor is that games start not this week, but next, week, Sept 12-13.