Everyone that knows me knows that I have been having a bit of a time staying awake, specially when I get in a repetitive boring situation. Driving, for instance, never was a problem, but in the last year or two, I get sleepy almost as soon as I get in the car. I can't pin it down as to when or why because I was able to drive to my in-laws on New Year's Eve with no problem, but sometimes driving to the mall here in town can be rough. Our solution, short term, has been to get Wife to drive everywhere we go. This should not be a problem, she drives everywhere for her job and it's not like we are going camping on rough roads or towing a great big trailer. I was the main driver from the time we started dating in 1987 until maybe two years ago which means I made it almost thirty years. She has a couple years and of course I have to be ever thankful and all that. My biggest joke is that the car is a time machine, I sit, close my eyes and poof, next thing I know I am in some other magical place. I guess Wife doesn't like that much.
I realize it is a bit of a jerk move to just get in the car and go to sleep, so the last couple of times I decided I was going to try and create some conversation. I don't have stories of coworkers, as I work alone, I don't have stories of my folks, as I talk for them for a few minutes and I'll relay to Wife right away any info she may need before I forget. Once all the activity from the boys is done, my favorite topic is my future material world. You dream about your stocks, bonds and portfolios, I will dream about my boats, RVs and waterfront cabins. I try to be level headed, but even starting the conversation with "This doesn't mean that I am going to go out tomorrow and buy this or that, but which would you prefer the most an RV or a boat, in the $100,000 range?", for example. Instead of indulging me and getting into a theoretical discussion which I think could be interesting and at least keep us talking through half the trip, I get the "goddam it, that is why we are broke, you have no inner control, can you just stop with the idea of spending money!" OK, but last I looked, I was the a-hole driving the 15 year old vehicle, I sold my boat at your suggestion to save on paying for storage, I buy maybe one pair of shoes a year, haven't bought new sunglasses in probably 3 years, yes I can run amuck, but I feel like I have made a lot changes to be better, but I get no credit around here, so I turn and do what I do best, sleep.
Yesterday, I wake up and we are in a heavy traffic jam, we are supposed to be there at 4:00, we have 18 miles to go and 20 minutes to get there. I notice people keep moving in the right most lane and say try it, she declares them assholes for 15 minutes and very expertly shows me how those people are all stopped over there, and instead goes left (we were behind an 18-wheeler), as soon as we move, we see that this is the lane that is closed ahead. Finally, she decides she wants to try the lane that is moving, two lanes over. It takes another 5 minutes but it works, we get off the freeway, do a 180 turn around and head back to I-10 a couple miles away. I explain how we are on the outer ring (1604), we just have to go on I-10 to 410 (inner ring) and find either Ingram Mall (we kind of know back roads from there, my mother-in-law worked there for a while) or another familiar road to get there.
All of a sudden I get stuff like it would be helpful if you were awake and kept me company, which I said "well, you weren't talking." She actually has the balls to say you weren't saying anything either. I almost had to pull out an old record player, plug it in with an old record and pull the needle across to make that urrhrrtt sound you make when you can't believe someone says something kind of dumb. "No, I tried last time and a bunch of times I want to talk about the day we are free of debt and how great it would be to buy a small waterfront lot and build a cabin or maybe just set it up with an RV or even a mobile home and nah, you'd rather I shut up and save all the money in the bank, so I have nothing else to say." She finally relented and said she does want to spend money on the house, such as put down new floors, we need them, 8 years in and our carpet is looking pretty bad. "Finally", I said, "this is something I can wrap my mind around, do you want just new carpet or are we going to do wood in all the house?" This is interesting to me, I could give two shits about your investment strategy, fine we can save money, but that is never going to be exciting. Tell me we are going to convert our carpeted stairs into some oak masterpiece and I am into that!
It doesn't hurt one to have dreams of what you would do in this scenario or that, come on, the worst thing you can do is shut down a dreamer. It can at the very least, be a fun exercise, if not a telling of what motivates this person. Every time I see those 500 million dollar lottos I can't help but think if I won one, I would buy a small jet plane and fly everywhere and buy a house on the lake. But that is what I dream about, what would you do?
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